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whitetea
whitetea
Feb 27, 2008 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

they only gave us gravity

I came to know
    when
            I locked my
hands around you
in protective circle
            the thin bands of life
the tragedy of fragile.

   then was knowing that even
if I had the will
                of ages
still you could fall
        still the Gods would laugh

at the walls of breath
        at the shields of skin

and for Pagan tries
        at meaning.

 

 

 

 

this is for the atheism vs religion contest, after thinking about it I will submit it under atheism.

— whitetea, Feb 27, 2008

About the Author

Region, Country: United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Chrystos, Mark Strand, Adrienne Rich, Naomi Shihab Nye, Rachel M. Simon, Donald Justice, Mary Oliver, Nikki Giovanni, Alice Walker, Bukowski, Mary Lambert

More from this author

Critiques

C

Conect11

18 years 3 months ago

thank you

thank you for your submission. Good luck! Mark W.
Mark

Mark

18 years 2 months ago

This poem makes me angry and

that is exactly what it should do whitetea :) being a knower :) not a believer but those are other stories. Congrats on your place in the contest ! Joy and Peace Mark
Rob Graber

Rob Graber

18 years 2 months ago

Congrats!

I agree with what your comment below the poem implies: This is somewhat ambiguously atheistic, since the title and five concluding lines could well be taken to concede that deities do exist, even if only distant and mocking. Except for not understanding why line 9 says "will" instead of "faith," I like the first eleven lines very much indeed, and I congratulate you heartily on the well-deserved award!
whitetea

whitetea

18 years 1 month ago

sorry for such a late reply!

this was written in a cynical light. i was very sick when i wrote this, about this time last year. someone told me they would do anything to help me be well again. i realized that there was little they could do, little i could do it if happened to them even if it meant sacrificing everything. i felt that the level of desperateness could be laughed at, by a being who had the power to change it. i grew up in a household that is very coldly religious and fundamentalist minded. i have a lot of things i can't understand or don't agree with with certain religions partly because of my upbringing. i promised myself i would live what most religions intend for a person. in a sense i am making a small person belief to live by. but when i wrote this, i felt my 'will' would be laughable by any god who i live separate of. this was written in the view that if there was a doubtful divine force in existence, i felt it being very purposely separate and on 'its' own agenda.
O

orgami

18 years 2 months ago

hey i spell congrats wrong

Beautiful poem love the "tradgedy of fragile" and "Pagan tries" nicely done!!! O
Mark

Mark

18 years 2 months ago

Me too O

I think it is - Congratulation whitetea ! Or would there be an "s" at the end? Geeze I hope Jess does not see this :( but then my timeing might make up for any spelling mis-spells :) hopefully Mark

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