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Small Wingless Creatures

We come into this world small wingless creatures,
and someone washes us of our mother's blood,
we cry out
and open our lungs to breathe
and somehow a tiny fist is large enough
to hold fast a parent's heart,
strong enough to form loose bonds
that will tear apart mind and body,
wrest a spirit from a soul,
and life is lived
in the loam of earth
on the broken back of selfish dreams

a dreamer must awaken before
the mouth is frozen in silence

and the blood dries with the spittle
and the days are counted in stone.



— Kailashana, May 23, 2008

Critiques

B

barbsdad2003

18 years ago

Masterful use ...

of language here evoking an accurate, resonatingly powerful imagery. Bold. Emotionally and! physically. And such a delight 'tis to see every word chosen thus carefully ... and spelt (spelt: a word used in the United Kingdom, I make clear for those who might not know) so very right. In appreciation, Chuck
Kailashana

Kailashana

18 years ago

Hi Chuck, …And I

Hi Chuck, ...And I appreciate your appreciation... I do so love the land of Eng... especially that delicious accent... sends me places where most folks would blush ;-) ~Anna
professor

professor

18 years ago

and the days are counted in stone

is a remarkably powerful image of still living but not being alive Anna. Birth and the feelings of a parent faced with that tiny fist attached to a helpless newborn are such poignant images of life and intense emotion and make this poem extremely emotive, especially with the way it ends. Keith
Kailashana

Kailashana

18 years ago

Thanks Prof.. I’ve been

Thanks Prof.. I've been going through tough times recently; however I wrote that poem in December I think... or maybe it's been 6 months of birth pangs... my own... drat! and double drat! ~Anna

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