Love Room / Liebesraum (David Partenheimer, trans.)

Is it wrong
To let love start to grow
When there seems no room
For it to bloom?

Would it be better
To harden the heart
And soul indeed
Against the very seed?

Ist es falsch
zu gestatten der Liebe zu wachsen
Wenn es scheint, kein Raum zu geben
Wo sie blühen kann?

Wäre es besser
Ein hartes Herz zu pflegen
Und auch die Seele
Gegen den Samen selbst?

— Rob Graber, Jul 11, 2009

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Rob,

I didn't know you knew any German! Ist es falsch der Liebe zu gestatten zu wachsen Wenn es keinen Raum zu geben scheint Wo sie blühen kann? Wäre es besser Ein hartes Herz zu pflegen Und in der Tat auch die Seele Gegen den Samen selbst? Have you seen/heard my German poem "Herbsttage" yet? Would love to hear your opinion. Yours, ~Nina P.S. "harden the heart"-> "das Herz zu verhärten" would be the literal translation.

Rob Graber

16 years 11 months ago

Only a Bit

Hi, Nina. I know only a bit of German; but for some reason this poem seemed to want to express itself (so to speak) in German as well as in English. My friend Dr. David Partenheimer, who teaches both English and German at Truman State University (where I am emeritus prof. of anthropology), kindly produced the translation. Thanks for your comment and version!

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Rob,

my version happens to be grammatically correct, whereas the other isn't. German is tricky, e.g. in its placement of verbs, which go to the end of a sentence if it is a dependant clause ("wenn"), and "indeed" means "in der Tat". Sorry to be a nitpicky pain in the bum, but I teach German, too, and it is my mother tongue. Yours, ~Nina

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.

Join free Log in