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Hitchhiker (warning graphic)

Hitchhiker

You were asking for it
in your boots and tight jeans.
I pulled up, reaching over,
opening the door for you.
Smiling, I inquired
where you were headed,
knowing full well
you would never make
your destination.
You were completely
at ease, a predator
unaware of being stalked.
I had watched you
for weeks on end,
observing the children
on the playground.
You never saw me
stealthily watching you.
Suddenly, last week,
opportunity came calling.
You stepped off the curb,
striking a pose
sticking out your thumb.
I was ready and prepared
with a stranger's smile
and a can of soda containing
a date rape drug, Rohypnol.
Greedily, you drank of it
ever so willingly.
When you passed out,
I drove you to my
cabin in the woods,
where I secured you
to a table in the cellar.
Patiently I awaited your return
to the conscious world.
Jubiliant, to see
the shock in your eyes
like a small animal
caught in a snare;
the moment was delicious.
Over the next few days,
I surgically peeled
thin strips of your skin
from your naked body,
and extracted the nails
from their pink beds,
listening to the music
of your pleading screams,
and your confession
for love of little boys,
promising to give them up
if only I would let you go.
Regrettably, you died too soon.
I guess your faint heart
betrayed you by giving out.
I almost cried  in frustration,
for next on my agenda
was amputation.
From one predator
to another, you were
an abysmal disappointment.

— Candlewitch, Oct 07, 2009

About the Author

Region, Country: Northwestern Wisconsin USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allan Poe, William Blake, Bob Dylan, Tom Petty, Carlos Castaneda, Jim Morrison, the whole of Neopoet and many more., Candlewitch

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More from this author

Critiques

TS

The Silent Saint

16 years 8 months ago

...

Oh dear Lord. Here I am planning to hitchhike to another city and then I come across this. It must be a sign.
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

hitchhiking...

Is not such a good idea. I used to hitchhike, met all kinds of loonies and a few nice people, too. But the crazies outnumbered the nice folk. Good luck to you. Always, Cat
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

?

Don't what? Always, Cat
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 8 months ago

Cat...

Let me share what happened when I saw your warning on the poem's title... an unannounced uncontrolled guttural groan, so seething, I had to look around to make sure no-one heard it, while knowing nobody else is here... goody goody gumdrops! and you (or Edge I should say) lived up to your warning, magnificently, the same sound came from me at the end, followed by a laugh, a belly roll of a laugh... well done! squeamishly manning the moon now... I needed a ride
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Richard

I am so glad you got a big kick out of this one. I know, it is even sick for me, lol. Thanks for everything. Always, Cat
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Richard

IMAO I'm so glad you enjoyed my poem, and found it to be as sick and twisted as advertised. Laughing is good for the heart and soul. Always, Cat
Hooded Stranger

Hooded Stranger

16 years 8 months ago

Oh! Queen of the twist

Dear CandlEdge, I'm blown away by this...I do love a good tale with a wicked and unexpected twist. I could twist the night away with you! You have that knack of keeping the reader interested and desperate to find out what twisty little ending you have in mind. I hope you have a real special one for Halloween, I know you have already teased us with 'Cemetery Road'...but I just know you have a shocker waiting for us! HS ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "With all that I am and all that I could be, I walk this earth and yet nobody sees me".
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Dan

I thank you and Edge thanks you, LOL! This one practically wrote itself. This may be the best that Edge can do. I'm not sure what I will write for Halloween. "Queen Of The Twists" I think that is the best compliments I have had in a very long time. I'm so glad you liked it, and I bow to you, The Dark Prince. Always, Cat
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Cat

This reminded me of a story I read about serial killers and there is one in particular that used to peal the skin off his victims I will have to look it up ... You and Edge are the perfect companions you know, hes the dark to your blinding light and you shine ever so bright as edge in this one my darlin' ... I read the title and thought OoOoooOOoo gotta read this one first lol and here I am loving the twist at the end ... damn I got a headache today NO sympathy its self inflicted lmao :P you have been writing so beautifully of late and I am loving having regular installments of your wonderful imagination ... you my dear woman are going to go places :) love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x x
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Jayne

I looked this up with google: When police went to Ed Gein's Plainfield, Wisconsin farm home to investigate the disappearance of a local woman, they had no idea they were about to discover some of the most grotesque crimes ever committed. There was a lot more information about him listed, so if you are still interested go look him up. He was a really sick and twisted guy. Thank you for all the compliments and Edge thanks you too. He wants to know if you have read his book yet? You take good care of yourself. Love, Cat
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Cat:

This will be the first violent/ graphic poem I would rate as magnificent. Your movie-like scene is certainly a warning for all predators to children. Great work! Your alter ego begins to make some sense to me, lol. Best Regards, Hugo
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Hugo

I have heard that there is honor among thieves and murderers. In prison they will kill child molesters. I'm so happy to know that Edge has impressed you and you understand him a little better now. Thank you so much for your critique. Always, Cat
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Hey Kelsey!

I really like your new avatar, it is fresh and scary. A form of capital punishment? I think that might be a bit difficult to get passed, but it's got my vote, lol. Nice to see you again, kiddo. How are your classes going? Always, Cat
L

lyz

16 years 8 months ago

brilliant

I would have used a potato peeler and peeled him like a banana. You, dear Cat, rock. Excellant. Love lyz. XX
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Lyz

A potato peeler... Hmmmmm... (to peel his banana, lol) I hadn't thought of that. Edge thanks you, and so do I. Always, Cat
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Cat ...

Congratulations on spotlight huni ... (huggles) this is so well done i was thinking after I logged out earlier ... a short story of this would be fantastic ? or novel I think you have it in you ... damn woman this is on par with some of best serial killer books I have read Patricia Cornwell, Kathy Reichs just to name a couple .... you are damn good woman ... love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x x
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Jay Knee 2 Bums

A short story, maybe, but a novel? I don't think I could stand to be around Edge for the time it would take to write a novel. The first Novel I wrote took me over three years and it is still being turned down. But thanks for the vote of confidence. You have much more faith in me than I do, LOL! Always, Cat
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

hello Kaligantsaros

I had no idea that the Greek were master torturers. Thank you for that information, and thank you for reading. Edge thanks you, too. Always, Cat
WF

Worldwide Freeride

16 years 8 months ago

oooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaayyy Psycho alert!

I don't know of you have ever seen the film The Hitcher but this really did remind me of it! This is such a brilliant story so very well written, the shocks and climaxes placed just rightly so to keep the reader interest and I can tell you I was transfixed to the screen with my mouth agape... but the brilliant twist of deranged and demented torturing each other was just sheer brilliance and took me by complete surprise, a vigilante that you don't mess with! Excellent word use, compelling story, good title, gripping storyline and that added Cat magic that you seem to whip up everytime I visit your pages! Truly an excellent masterpiece of writing! You surely must be an established writer with a pen such as yours? Dale :)
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

hello Dale

It is interesting that you have asked about being an established writer. To answer your question, yes, I (Edge aka Eddy Styx) has his first book out. The title is: "The Book Of Styx" by Eddy Styx. This is what was said about it: The Book of Styx by eddy styx by C. M. Mattison The Book of Styx is new wave avant-garde poetry that intersects the realities of two worlds: ours, and the Other. The things we dare not think and do, Eddy Styx [the alter ego of C. M. Mattison] revels in. The poetry is a novel way of exposing our human foibles so that we might wallow in them. After all, we can do what we want in the Other, because it's not really real . . . is it? Styx/Mattison's poetry has been likened to that of an evil Kendall Evans. Come find out why. It can be found in only one place, on-line at the Genre Mall: http://genremall.livejournal.com/46039.html I saw the Hitcher, the older one with Rutger Hauer, and it scared the socks off me. I am a horror fan but I prefer the scary to the gorey films. I'm fond of Dean Koontz and Stephen King. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this poem. Always, Cat
W

Wafi

16 years 8 months ago

Lucky He Died Soon, Cat

Lucky he died soon, Cat, lol, "Next on my agenda was amputation"... I liked your style. The words flowed so well and the story kept me reading it to the end, curiously. Sincerely, Wafi "Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!" ~Afzal Shauq~
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

hello Wafi

Yes, it was lucky for him that he died soon. Thank you for your kind praises. Always, Cat/Edge
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 8 months ago

In English

we would call this "come Upance"... or at least 'he got his'... Interesting subject - macabre and menacing. At first glance I had a version of a lady being picked up, coming away from the park with 'her own kids'... Wow was I ever wrong! Hence point made as above. We humans ( en masse at least) do have a predilection for justice being served! You certainly did that "On a platter"! Good sinister write Cat! Boni
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

=0)

Hi Boni, Sinister is what Edge strives to be, so thank you for your comments on this twisty tale. Glad you read it and responded! Always, Cat/Edge
seabhac

seabhac

16 years 8 months ago

Keep comming back to this

I always thought the macabre fascination with road accidents was for other people and here I find myself back at this poem for the 5th time and I have been unable to understand my reluctance to comment and yet driving for a few hours today I found myself thinking on it...it is an excellent poem ,certainly but it disturbs me deeply and the 'stone throwers' comments above unnerve me. Now what does that say about me, I am unsure but boy you know how to stir them... Hugs Seabhac
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Hi Seabhac

Hitchhiker is a very disturbing piece, and rightly so it should disturb you. It says something about the mentality of a multitude of societies today. I'm glad you think it is an excellent poem, and thank you for the five beautiful stars. Always, Cat/Edge
greeneyes

greeneyes

16 years 8 months ago

wow!

I love disturbing pieces! you are brilliant! This was wonderful. love, Elizabeth
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

=0)

Thank you, dear Elizabeth! Always, Cat
C

CyberSpace

16 years 8 months ago

dear kat

dear kat i need to say this "BOO YAH" i love it death to the dogs one shot one kill i absolutely love it love snake xxxx (ps) jayne say's hello love you
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Snake

Thank you for your comments on my poem "Hitchhiker" and for your support. Tell Jayne, "hello" from me and give her my love. Always, Cat
A

Annie-Rae

16 years 7 months ago

wow

I'm speechless. you are amazing!
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 7 months ago

Hello Annie-Rae

Thank you so much for your kind praise, and for stopping by my page. Always, Cat

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