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Tick-tock Beat

The clock is ticking, ticking, ticking

The hands giving time a licking, licking

Faced with the hours, time's minutes stand

Racing against the second-hand

Tick, tick, tick, each time the pendulum swings

At the opposite end, tock, tock, tock, it sings

Wind up the clock, give a push to start

Tick-tock beat, like that of a heart

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock

All of time beating in a heart-shaped clock

How much time do we have left?

Do you want to know? Make a guess?

Tick, tick, tick, it could make you sick

Thinking about the time left to you

Tick-tock, tick-tock, the heart-shaped clock

Only has so much time that it will view

The hands of time, hours and minutes

Second-hand chasing the tick-tocks in it

Life is time, your's and mine

All you can ask... is time be kind

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock

Life in the heart-shaped clock

— Geezer, Nov 19, 2009

About the Author

Region, Country: New York State - USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Poe, Emily Dickenson, Robert Frost, Shakespeare, and many of the poets here at Neopoet.

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Critiques

O

Orphani

16 years 6 months ago

Geeze this is a great poem

Geeze this is a great poem with a fantasticly sublime beginning.You start to lose it tecknically tword the end but with a little work you can refine this to greatness. Did you ever believe you would become a great poet? You are. Hows the dog? Is he still putting up with you or has he left home. Let every day be lifes poem. smile your face needs it. Your friend and fellow poet. Barry........o...
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 6 months ago

Never figured on being great...

Good maybe. I am glad you liked it. I know it could probably use a few tweaks, and glad to hear whatever you and Jayne or anyone can offer. The dog is still with me. She won't run away she knows she has it too good. And besides, who would do her job? She is my lunch alarm. If I go to long without eating lunch, she comes and tells me. "Dad, it's time for lunch" . ~ Gee
O

Orphani

16 years 6 months ago

Are you familiar with Edgar

Are you familiar with Edgar Alan Poes Poetry? If not, Start with his poem " THE BELLS" study his rhyming tecknique. and critiques.You learn how to build a house by studing carpentry teckniques. Then you use your imagination to develope your individual style.Remember! Never believe what you can achieve is unachievable. Our beliefs in our own limitations are usually our limitations.You are great. And you may write the greatest poem ever written, though the world may never read it.Make the stars your goal and Ill see you there.Barry....o..
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 6 months ago

Familiar...

Yes, I am somewhat familiar with Poe's poems. This was the result of reading and re-reading my three favorites. The Raven, The Tell-tale Heart, and The Pit and The Pendulum. I tried to incorporate the rhyming patterns of all of them to make this seem as though Poe might have written something like it. I am going to tweak it over the week-end, and try to make it better, [if not great] LOL Thank you much for your comments and confidence in my abilities. ~ Gee
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hardcorechick28

16 years 6 months ago

i am quite familiar

With Edgar Allan Poe...hence why he was the focus of my chat the other night. The Bells is a fantastic piece. I am still working on my rhyming skills, all though i could learn from my 5 year old. The other night he was tryin to come up with a poem and had the rhyming down better then me.
O

Orphani

16 years 6 months ago

Some suggestions on the

Some suggestions on the creative prosses. When you offer suggestions the impression is given, that you sit on some high throne in the poetry world with all seeing eyes, and dispense your crumbs of wisdom, like a god to your devoted and hungry subjects of the poetry world. This is not the case when I do . I will tell you that I think my work is at preasant the poor and ragged begging of my quest to write the second most inflential poetry of all time. The first being the poems for music in the psalms of the old testament of the bible. That being said, we sit at the same table, and break the same bread. My hand will pass to you, and yours will pass to me, as brothers. No more -- no less. The proud and pompous will feed themselves the fat of their own gods and eat alone I will not sit at their table,nor savor their delicasies, for my place is with my own. You must master the poem, and that is to master yourself.You must step out of your self, and see yourself as you are in truth. Expand and grow. the subject of this poem is time and its relationship to life. Imagine you are in an invisable box. this is your definition of you and your life. So your poem is in a box. We are more than we imagine.Everything starts with an idea.You want to do a hand stand . I can't, I am old, I am sick ya da, ya da, ya da, on ad nuseum. Why do a hand stand. Am I crazy? To master your body and your mind.To learn to grow, to expand, to break out of the box we have come to believe is real, and is but a lie I have convinced myself of. What is time. ? what is life go there and come back with a poem that will live past the dust of time. Hug the dog for me,if he don't stink.Barry....o...
Seren

Seren

16 years 6 months ago

Dearest Gee

I literally could hear your clock tick tick tick tick ... beautifully done ... love and biggest hugs Jayne x x x P.s sorry for short comments am tired lovie (hugz) p.p.s with be back with some suggestions to tighten it up a little ;) tomorrow morning
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 6 months ago

Be waiting on ya...

I thought I would get a few comments before the tweaks. I'm sure that you all have some good suggestions and I could use some help here, on this one. ~ Higgest bugs, and lotta love, Gee
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hardcorechick28

16 years 6 months ago

great poem

really makes you think...life is so short, you dont really know how much time you have left....you dont know how much time you have left for anything really.....awesome poem...thanks for coming to my room last night....:)
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 6 months ago

Happy to be there...

I thought it went rather well. Needs a tweak or two, but yes, you never know how much time there is. Will tweak later, right now, I am late for breakfast and meds. See ya later ~ Gee

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