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ID
Ink Dragon
Apr 02, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Spring nights (Frühlingsnächte)

Nocturnal breezes
pregnant with hyacinth scent
announce thermal change
that weighs on the minds of birds
summers golden messengers

~

Nächtliche Winde
hyazinthenduftschwanger
künden von Wärme
die Vogelschwärme umtreibt
Sommers goldene Boten
— Ink Dragon, Apr 02, 2010
More from this author

Critiques

Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years 2 months ago

that's one word? wow.

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis! hehe I really hope you'll turn this poem into a spoken word piece! I don't care what language you use it's always beautiful! The only thing that I think you could possible improve would be to make the breezes singular. That would change: breezes-->breeze announce--> announces change--> changes weighs--> weigh I think that would sound a little better, mostly because the word 'weighs' sounds strange to me. You could probably just change that one word and the adjustment would be sufficient, but I'm not sure what else you could use because 'presses' and 'pushes' and 'lingers' also sound a little weird. Well what do you think, Nina? Kelsey
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

I hear you loud and clear, Kels,

but that would mean that all these lines would fall short by a syllable. I am trying to do structured poetry here, so I'd better adhere to syllable count, I think. But perhaps there is a way I can make it work, I will certainly continue to look. Yours, ~Nina
Seren

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Nina

Short but bringing with it the scent of hyacinth and sommer ? summer ? or is sommer refering to something else a name perhaps ? love and hugs Jayne-Chloe
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Jayne,

you're quite right, Sommer means summer. Germans insist on spelling every noun with a capital letter, not just proper nouns, as the English do. Did you smell it? I have hyacinths in my kitchen, lovely scent. Yours, ~Nina
Seren

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

ahhhh thanks for telling me,

ahhhh thanks for telling me, never realised that in german nouns were spelt with a captiol letter ... funny you would think I would have picked it up all those years singing but i guess I was more intent on the music and not the words ... oh how times have changed wasnt sure if sommer was a name or summer lol love and big hugs JayCee x x x
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 2 months ago

You set the pollen flying

Ann of Norway The golden pollen flying on the breezes to awaken the birds. How I would like to understand the German version! I like this "Vogelschwärme." It has the warmth of the Spring sunshine loaded with birds as if they were part of it. Love to you from Ann
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Ann,

you are very perceptive and obviously have an innate talent for languages. Vogelschwärme means swarms of birds, but there is also the word Wärme (warmth) hidden in there. Blowing hyacinth scent and love to Norway... Yours, ~Nina
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear David,

winter is now officially over. Time to wake up ;) Yours, ~Nina
L

lyz

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Nina

Perfectly perfumed and written. Love Lyz. XX
M

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Just lovely

Nina this is pleasantly put and yes the springs fragrance is all around outside, in the tulips and all the lovely colors and birds all over, I love this time of year here. Hope your doing fine and Dad is too. Blessings to you and yours in the coming days ahead. Love, Mona Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Mona,

glad you enjoyed the poem, and thank you for the blessings and good wishes, I hope you are having wonderful holidays. Yours, ~Nina
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Hello Draki,

thank you. Nice to meet you, will have to check out your work too. Yours, ~Nina
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 2 months ago

Nina...

A wonderful little poem filled with the scent of summer. Thank you for posting it in German too. I find the language quite colorful, and I wish I had spent more time learning it. I was watching a show on the tube the other day and the german word for envy was used, I wish now I had written it down...
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Richard,

this was one of the rare occasions when a poem came to me in German first. Usually, they come in English. Neid (envy, pronounced like night)? I don't think you have anything to be envious about... Yours, ~Nina
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Nina

Short but complete. I can almost smell all those summer scents. Very good. Always, Cat
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Cat,

that was what I was hoping for :) Isn't it wonderful that spring has finally arrived? Yours, ~Nina
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 2 months ago

Hello again Nina

It must be the Spring in that air that brought you back to the site! Haven't seen you in so long! Very compact, write. In both languages. Just check the spelling of summer in the English version - you have included sommer! Alles Klar und Gut gemacht! ;) Boni
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

Gosh, Boni,

I just fell down from my chair, laughing at myself! Never saw the o that had crept in, thanks :) I am still working on getting back into my stride here on Neo. Will have to check out your recent posts soon! Yours, ~Nina
artygirl87

artygirl87

16 years 2 months ago

A lovely poem that makes you

A lovely poem that makes you feel like your taking a deep breath and letting the scent of hyacinth fill your nostrils. Well written.

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