brittle light

Jan 20, 2013 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Linearity

I unraveled my brain
stretched - it - out - in - a - line
it was long

tiny beads of instants
each,
incommunicado
with
all
others

it was
fun until it
got alltangleyandknottedup
again

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: upstate New York USA, USA

Comments

weirdelf

12 years 6 months ago

This made me smile

As I read the first stanza my inner fascist scientist screamed "you can't! The brain is a complex gestalt, linearity is anathema to it!"

The second two stanzas made up for it. The concrete poetry aspects
stretched - it - out - in - a - line
and
alltangleyandknottedup
work well.

brittle light

12 years 6 months ago

thanks, Jess

I have not been around here for awhile. I miss it, and hope to write more soon.
...ups and downs...around and around....

BettyBuff

12 years 6 months ago

clever concrete

Bravo...fun read.

Ells

brittle light

12 years 6 months ago

hello

thank you for your comment...much appreciated

Seren

12 years 6 months ago

brilliant

I thought it was wonderful I can't see anything to add or change

Bravo

Regards Jc x

brittle light

12 years 6 months ago

hi, Jc

thank you for your generous compliment

Ian.T

12 years 6 months ago

BL

One after my own heart,
or should I dare say Brain,
Mine only stretches a mile,
It stretched a little bit!
This made me smile,
Am having an ex tension put in
Where I worry less lol,
Yours Ian.T

brittle light

12 years 6 months ago

hello, Ian

it has been awhile! glad you got something from this. It was a very quick write...just trying to get back in the old saddle again... thanks

Ian.T

12 years 6 months ago

Al

Look forward to your future writes as this one adds another facet in our poetry range.
I sometimes try others style when seeing new ways, it is quite refreshing.
Take care Yours Ian.T