NO MORE RIBBONS

No reprieve, no second chance
No turning back to do, undo
Time has passed her by
Without a glance

Life unfair, left in despair, no more ribbons in her hair
What had been grace and beauty
Now turned to songs unsung
And no one there to listen or to care

Fading flowers, empty hours
Potential unmet, doors now shut
Empty dreams o'er which to grieve
Life once sweet, now turned to wine that soured

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Texas, USA

Favorite Poets: rethinking this. have recently started reading the works of some of the greats, I will comment later

Comments

scribbler

12 years 3 months ago

Hi Linda

Long time bo read lol. What a bitter-sweet poem. I expect we all feel this way at times.Only suggestion I have on poem is to use something other than "potential" in last stanza. For some reason that doesn't seem to fit althought it's explicit. Maybe "promise"?...............stan

Linda Moses

12 years 3 months ago

Hi, Stan

Nice to hear from you. This is a write about my Mother. She's been gone a while, now. One of those impropto things I will try another word for potential. Thanks for the suggestion.

Linda

Ian.T

12 years 3 months ago

Lida

Long time No read, welcome home young Lady, just a few niggles in this piece:-
Fading flowers, empty hours
Doors now shut, FEELINGS unmet (Or something like that )
Empty dreams on which to grieve (On maybe )
Life once sweet, now made of wine that soured
Great to see you back have missed your works, Yours Ian.T

Linda Moses

12 years 3 months ago

Hey, Ian

thank you for reading and commenting. If Mom where here, she would object, and correct what she felt needed changing. English major, you know. They are rough to get by. Will go over poem with you suggestions in mind; Thanks, Linda

wesley snow

12 years 3 months ago

This is your first for me.

Hi.
I liked it very much. The internal rhyme pleases me and I'm afraid I didn't have a problem with potential as Stan did. Therefore, nothing to suggest except... in the second to last line- is "ore" a typo or am I missing something?
Please don't take offense at my nit picking over spelling. I do it to everyone in hopes they will do it for me.
A haunting little poem... um, welcome back?

Linda Moses

12 years 3 months ago

Hello, Wes

The or"e used I thought might be a short way of saying "over", although I admit I was unsure when I used it. You are not "picking". I appreciate your comments. Thanks so much.

Linda