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May 19, 2013
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Morning
No matter the vibrant or rain soaked things
happening outside my window
or between the space
where floor
doesn't quite
meet door,
I linger in my own soft breeze.
As I be breezing,
I be fluttering.
My lips be muttering.
My poetry stuttering
desires I keep
just for you
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Comments
Rula
12 years 1 month ago
Morning S.G. Blue
Nice lightsome piece. I loved the first stanza best
But when I came to the second I was puzzled with your use of
"be" instead of "is". It really sounds archaic in such a modern piece.
But maybe that's only me
I've enjoyed the read anyway..