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Aug 17, 2013
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Self-induced
Why was I given life?
I live with the sin
I will be given no apologies from those who offend
I am a container.
a vessel of blank.
The music is dark and so is my soul
I am not given light. I do not credit the ones who show mercy.
I am evil. I am nothing.
Good for those who dwell.
Why do I continue to live?
Everything is void.
Everything.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I feel messed up
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ian.T
12 years 2 months ago
Katrina
The container can be refilled, you can do this with the things you select.
I liked the piece you wrote till I read at the bottom that you felt messed up.
Nowadays this goes hand and hand with life, it is not an easy journey but there are many that can walk with you and help with your writing.
You sound young enough to be able to study and learn the correct forms and layouts of Poetry, there is all the time in the world for young ones like you.
Read some of the classics and ask for help in as many ways as you wish this is a workshop and that's why we gather here.
Take care out there, and lets see your next Piece, see if you can find one of our mentors,
Yours Ian.T
KatrinaPhotophobia
12 years 1 month ago
:)
I am taking up linguistics and literature now. im not yet done with all my literature subjects though. I will take up masters (If i can support myself) after i graduate, hopefully march 2014. yes i still have a lot to learn about poetry :)
KatrinaPhotophobia
12 years 1 month ago
By the way, I'm glad you
By the way, I'm glad you liked it :)
Ian.T
12 years 1 month ago
Katrina
If this is part of the workshop, edit the poem and tick the box that says for workshop it will give you a choice.
Also on the right of your title just type:-
Naked Emotion, Truth and Originality this will bring it to the attention of the workshop poets.
Take care out there, and hope you do well with your work,
Yours Ian.T