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CRAP
By Ian Thomson
The economic situation in the European nations
Is the reason why our savings disappear
For the banks gave all our money
To their pals, who think it’s funny,
To get free loans for champagne and high-strength beer
This social deprivation leads to food banks, near starvation
But our feathered friends seem happy with their lot
For although we’re nearly skint,
Those seabirds seem to have a mint,
Put deposits on new cars they haven’t bought.
Each new spring seems like the last, Trying not to “Damn and Blast!!”
Wiping seagull doo from doors and wings of motor
Taking comfort from the cry
“Thank God cows and sheep can’t fly!”
Then stomp indoors for another pail of water.
You would think the human race could put seagulls in their place
But the public love them, there’s no “ifs” or “buts”.
Using dubious charisma
To ensure they leave no prisoners,
Their poo bomber raids completely drive us nuts!
About This Poem
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Roscoe Lane
11 years ago
Excellent,
Excellent poem and so very true Tam. Regards Roscoe...
Tam the Chanter
11 years ago
bird-shit
hanks for the crit, Roscoe- musn't get too serious with the way of the world.
Ian
scribbler
11 years ago
Hi
The transition from the priviledged to gulls was pretty abrupt. But I guess it'a close race as to which craps on us the most lol.......stan PS that part about folks loving gulls kinda made me think of that poem I wrote lol
Tam the Chanter
11 years ago
gulls
Thanks for the contact, scribbler, I was asked to write something for the bird-watchers summer magazine, so that is why the poem jumps about a bit. You are dead right about being shat on by those who should know better. We've even got Obama telling us Scots not to vote for independence in the coming referendum. What a twat.
Ian
scribbler
11 years ago
yeah
That community organizer will likely go down as one of our worst presidents.i am ashamed that there were so many idiots in this country that he was able to get re-elected...........stan
emeka ozurumba
11 years ago
you do not define the
you do not define the equivocation to the solution by a suggestion, which makes you a sociolinguistic critique nearing the brink of absolute disembarkation from the cosmic disaster of man made governments and the calamity they inflict, i was hoping to read more from that dimension, especially after the digression to sea gulls , the environ they create makes it more serene though the magnitude of your discussion is very enormous, which i totally understand but just perchance i advice this after reading this very creative piece
Tam the Chanter
11 years ago
dictionary
Thanks (I think) for your kind words. I am very impressed by your linguistic acrobatics and can only regret that my poem was not as entertaining as your crit. The only disagreement I have is your reference to seagulls and serenity - two words which are complete strangers to each other.
Best wishes
Ian Thomson
Ian.T
11 years ago
Ian
Ian here, good rant, I remember vividly what seagulls can do.
We took a ferry trip to Bilbao once it was a round trip of three days for shopping.
We arrived at the port at 5-30 am, damn seagulls bombed the then wife and boy did it chuck up, have you ever tried to find a place open at that time in the morning lol, so she had to wait till about 6-30 before it could be sorted, great start to a long day.
Take care here Yours Ian.T
Tam the Chanter
11 years ago
rant on regardless
Thanks for the contact, ,Ian It's amazing how many people have horror stories about gulls.
Take Care
Ian
Seren
11 years ago
Dearest Ian
What a great write, I thoroughly enjoyed the read...I looked it over I really cant find anything to suggest to improve it... I will revisit it when I get time and go over it again but I am finding it hard to offer anything
kudos
love and hugs Jayne xxx