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Lonely Nights
This place seems so empty
The music in my ears so dull
Where are you all? Please call.
I sit here as the day passes
Thinking of things to do
Tempered by keys I cannot see.
Where are you out there?
That you seem to have forgotten me
The stars are dim or is it my eyes?
It is time for us all to share
Why do you just sit and stare
I will be here for as long as it takes
Your new day will bloom
Or the old one will cling to you
Damn I have things to share time is few.
Let us build bridges in ether clear
Find things for us to share
Dreams of being in other lands
I have walked with you for many years
Tell me now of all the cares
I will share them with you my friends
The new world may be it will soon end
Shall I wait for you all without cause?
Or are you going to have the balls.
To speak to me in this now
About This Poem
Last Few Words: SO!! I had a quarter of an hour before bed, to fill in, lol
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ian.T
10 years 11 months ago
Eph
Great to see you here again have missed your raw words lol.
We need some quiet battles on site to awaken some of these poets,
Yours Ian.T
lovedly
10 years 11 months ago
if you r also ung ..thetwin dangling balls must be fun
time is few.!!!!!!
u may like to relook
few!
otherwise you know
now I dare
to flare!
Ian.T
10 years 11 months ago
Loved
Thanks for your cryptic reply will be OK with this new language one day lol.
Thanks for popping in, Yours Ian.T
lovedly
10 years 11 months ago
change as u also say
only is permanent a way
today tomorrow and twas yesterday
and you also so say
alidzain
10 years 11 months ago
Hello Ian
Nicely written. First time I see you lose gentle side in your poetry. Still busy visiting relatives for the season but I'll be here as soon as I can.
Alid
Ian.T
10 years 11 months ago
Alid
Thank you for your visit, yes sometimes I change the way I write, the Digit series and a few others are examples.
I do know swear words but avoid them as being illiterate but sometimes they attract attention.
Thanks again, Yours Ian.T
PS:- your priority is to look after your family, give them my best thoughts and extra for young Alid..
Barbara Writes
10 years 11 months ago
This is nice Ian. T
A lovely read. I had to check define "ether" bc I thought this maybe a error. A new word nice to have learn.