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EVE edit

EVE

A little blue sky
a little sunshine
some clouds strolling by
a day to be alive.

But Eve is gone.
Passed just yesterday
time to cry
time to pray
time to mourn a friend,

though pain seems to end
it lingers still
in the heart

a little blue sky
a little sunshine
some clouds strolling by
a day to be alive

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

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Comments

Rula

Rula

10 years 5 months ago

Wow!

This is intriguing in a way. The double meaning of the title gives the reader a food for thought.

lovedly

lovedly

10 years 5 months ago

and thats all we need

share and believe
twill lend more life
more air
than a simple hello
twill not do
so 4 folks like you i care
read my poetry

'half life

and then you will see
what i did once
when I was at sea
you now see

judyanne

judyanne

10 years 5 months ago

stanza three

seems to me to be contradictory to itself
I would say more like
'Pain diminishes
to linger sweetly
in the heart'

- just the way I read it Joe

I love the imagery of the first stanza, and its repetition at the end
love judy
xxx

judyanne

judyanne

10 years 5 months ago

then how about something like

Though pain may seem to end
Still it lingers sweetly
In the heart

just me of course Joe
But it seems to me that if pain ends, it doesn't linger...

Love judy
xxx