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May 11, 2015
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Lamp (An Exploration of Style- Haiku)
In the far distance
a light leads me to meaning
I follow or not
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Sparrow
10 years 1 month ago
Jess
A Haiku perfectly executed and the questions it brings up are relevant to the original Japanese writing form.
Yours with nothing more to say,
Ian
NB:- My comments or crit are to keep your workshop entries at the top of the stream.
But relevant to their structure..
weirdelf
10 years 1 month ago
ta
mate
judyanne
10 years 1 month ago
a haiku from the master
Great one Jess
Perfect cutting line - you make it seem so simple...
Love judy
xxx
weirdelf
10 years 1 month ago
I know why I never wrote a novel
and instead mastered the shortest forms, haiku and limerick. It is because I am a coward and a control freak. I'm afraid of exposing my dark side. Neopoets think they've seen it? Not half.
scribbler
10 years 1 month ago
The good
thing about Haiku is they leave little volume in which to make mistakes. The "syllable" count is either right or it isn't and the message is either there or not. But in this one even the mood is Eastern........stan
weirdelf
10 years 1 month ago
ta
though it is not truly haiku or senryu by content.
Pugilist
10 years 1 month ago
Content rules for haiku have morphed
I like this. It flows and feels right.
The rules for haiku have morphed to a degree that, in some cases, even syllable count/sound units are being ignored.
But this hearkens back to the intent of a haiku, in my mind.