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Free to Be
I want to be just like Palestine;
Fair as its summer
Fresh as its spring
Rich as its winter
And what 'tshould bring
Calm as its shores
Rebellious as its sea
Proud and forever
Like the olive tree
Strong as its Rock
Brilliant as its oil
Spirited as its streets
Generous as its soil
I want to be elegant
Just as its nights
Vivid and lively
And always bright
I'll rather die
Or else be free
I'll always fight
For my dignity
About This Poem
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Esker
8 years 6 months ago
Wow! Rula this is beautiful!
blows me away
the lilt and waltz and walk
and wander
and strength and dignity
and might!
Yes keep your heart
your dreams
Alight!!
Thank U Rula!
Steven!
Esker
8 years 6 months ago
It even dusted cobwebs
from memory on my letter
form ending!
I had forgotten to include
the name to sender
all my thank U's before
feel and read like Im
thanking myself!
Ah the personal touch!
U have it my dear!
a true traveller!
the heart for detail!
a tenderness
and fierceness
I admire!
Your Canadian Reader!
Candlewitch
8 years 6 months ago
:)
such lovely descriptions and wishes...why cannot we all be this way? good title, loved the structure and imagery. this is a peek into your heart!
*hugs, Cat
Geezer
8 years 6 months ago
Elegantly said...
Logically tendered. ~ Gee.
.
valene
8 years 6 months ago
'Free to Be'...a lovely sentiment....
This has a lyrical tone to it and the way you've structured it helps to enhance the read. Your imagery is well described making it easy to visualize things that you love about Palestine. I believe this was written form the heart which makes it an even more enjoyable read!
'Free to Be' .....wouldn't it be nice if we could all shared this goal and pursue it together?!!
valene
Rula
8 years 6 months ago
Thank you ladies
and gentlemen for your kind and supporting words. They are highly appreciated especially in this critical time.
Thank you
alidzain
8 years 4 months ago
Salam, Rula
Bravo! I LOVE IT!
Alid
lovedly
8 years 4 months ago
Rula you are ABS FREE
That's why
now you never read me