Ode to the Cell Phone March Contest

great personification with lots of humor and facts...I loved the rhythm of caller tune of your cell
I suggest you suffix the title with [for March Contest}]

best of luck ..
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Do enter it! Great bit of humor!

making the "voice" of the poem the phone. True about the grammar part, we all hate it. How many texts we have to resend with the corrected slang or word we chose, but the damn phone corrected. Who asked it to???

I would consider dropping this line "Can you guess who I am?" we know who it is, it becomes rhetorical and and just eliminating it makes no difference to the logic of the last stanza.

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I'd love to set this to music. I read it and I hear the tune already...

love it

...but your rhythm pot-holes here and there and spoils an otherwise excellent ride.

Best wishes....val.

we're backing ourselves
in a corner
cos technology dictates us to yield.
we can go where we like
in our bedroom
and walk with our words in a field
where all of the lambs
they are springing
with joy, beside their dearest ma
to the trailer, there in the corner
that's shortly
for Nick's abettoir.

Best wishes....val.