raj

Jul 09, 2018 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Cycle of Impermanence [Renga]

many leaves drifted
gently touching ground zero
without any shout

barely anyone noticed
soon winds of change arrived

birds and their offspring
were mute witness to the fall
from a trembling branch

by instinct they chose to move
in search of a new abode

in script after script
on pages that got flipped
new poems were writ

but none stayed there forever
making way for next of kin

the now becomes then
like is summer to the fall
spring lets winter thaw

only change is permanent
like father time says move on

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Eastern

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

Comments

Rula

7 years ago

You've

done an exquisite work here my friends. This is absolutely distinguished and I couldn't pick a favorite, but like it as a whole
Well done all!

raj

7 years ago

Thank you Rula for your words

Thank you Rula for your words of appreciation which are very inspiring coming from one of my Mentors...

warmly..
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Rula

7 years ago

Raj

so sorry. I thought this is a co-operative Renga. I've just noticed it's all yours. This is a work that you should be definitely proud of.

raj

7 years ago

This not collaborative poem like the Renga conducted by Barbara, I thought a collection of Tanka make a Renga even if it is by a single writer. If my understanding is wrong let me know so that I shall delete [Renga} from the title.

I don't know if the abstract comes out as well other than "only change is permanent"

Tanka 1: Many perish [could be even people] without getting noticed
Tanka 2: Is also about the displaced migrants
Tanka 3: Poems is in the context of landscapes which are erased over time
Tanka 4: Don't sit over your laurels

I am not sure if I did succeed in bringing out the above...
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Rula

7 years ago

Dear raj

Each tanka is a poem of its own and together they make an inspiring renga indeed. I'm not an expert at this myself. All I know is that your work is highly anticipated.

raj

7 years ago

Dear Rula

many thanks for returning to this page and your continual good words which are like tonic and will inspire me to do better...

warmly..
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chevyvent

7 years ago

Everything is a delight

Everything is a delight in this piece warm words to you. You lit a fragrance of love through this timeless piece. Made you think of the colorization of sights and sounds. Really good writing you have to stand in one accord very together to the point. Further, as if a decorated mast has supplied the cadence toward this great piece. Lastly, wouldn't change a thing its that good.

raj

7 years ago

Thanks Mario

for the read ...many a time some of your comments seem not be connected to the poem but more of the content as copy and paste .from may be a bank of preprepared comments ..
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