us now

it took a lot to get to where we are
the point way past the point of no return
the place where i feel nerved by your presence
it took a lot for me to hate you the way i do
your voice
your mannerisms
even your scent
they burn me
the thing i hate the most is everything
you smother me
at least you try
you try so hard to make me hate the person i am
and the one you’re supposed to love most
not me
another she
she just lets it happen
turns a blind eye
why?
she is broken
she is scared
she doesn't know who she is without you
you know this
you take advantage of this
she takes everything
her medicine
yours
you punish her for your sins
and for what?
a perfectly beautiful woman she is
she was
that one crack in her now splintered into so many
it really takes a lot from me to hate you
almost everything
i fear a lot for the other ones
the other “she’s” of your life
what you’ve done to them
what you will do
i fear for myself
what more you’ll do to
me
i mean there isn’t much left
so next time we fight
no more threats
just do it
hit me
because at least then
i’ll be free