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S
By scribbler, 26 May, 2020

Welcome to the titles workshop. This one will be a bit different than previous ones as I intend to put the entire shop on stream in hopes that those who have never participated in one will see that doing so is painless.
So to begin with let's talk about titles.
Introduction:
Let's think about titles. Everybody who reads a poem reads the title first. It is the bait adorning the hook of the poem. If the title isn't appetizing an otherwise excellent poem may well be passed over by the reader. Think about a couple of famous titles; "The Raven" and "The Road Less Travelled". Two titles which could just as easily have been used could be "The Road I Took" and "A bird At Night".They both set the table for the poem that follows just not as well as the titles used. What about these titles makes them special (or any other excellent title for that matter? Now is when ya'll jump in with Your thoughts on titles......

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

OK

It is clear that what I want was misconstrued. Particular titles will always be there to be considered. But YOU thoughts on titles in general will likely give a wide variety of the ways we all think on titles

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Alan, that's a great poem,

Alan, that's a great poem, apt for V.E. I think the title in Roman numbers doesn't do it justice, but Shakespeare did the same. "More Poems" is also a bit weak. But who am I to question such great poets...lol.

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Here's another poem apt for V

Here's another poem apt for V.E. day. Myself, I don't like the title very much, because many nationalities died in WWI. My two great uncles perished there, aged about 20 years old.

The English Dead

Give honour to our heroes fall'n, how ill
Soe'er the cause that bade them forth to die.
Honour to him, the untimely struck, whom high
In place, more high in hope, 'twas fate's harsh will
With tedious pain unsplendidly to kill.
Honour to him, doom'd splendidly to die,
Child of the city whose foster-child am I,
Who, hotly leading up the ensanguin'd hill
His charging thousand, fell without a word--
Fell, but shall fall not from our memory.
Also for them let honour's voice be heard
Who nameless sleep, while dull time covereth
With no illustrious shade of laurel tree,
But with the poppy alone, their deeds and death.

S

Sparrow 42

5 years 1 month ago

Titles

These are the bait to catch us small fish..
Then the skill of the fisherman is to make it clear that the bait was just there to retain your interest.
Many poems that even with a good title lose the readers as the content leaves us wondering what we are doing..
If only we could bait our hooks with words that draw people in, and then the content lets them know the reason why..
Yours, Ian T

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Titles

Can be much more than just bait. They can also give hints as to a second or even third level to the poem. since it's mine I can easily think of one titled "Bridges" the poem itself describes a simple repair to a small bridge . But by adding the "S" to it a person can infer that there are MANY types of bridges and many of them don't span water lol. Do ya'll have any examples of this use of titles?

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 1 month ago

what about Rudyard Kiplings

If
could it have been better
IF WHAT or IF only
Each reader has a mind of one's own... it is not only the title that matters but who is the manufacturer/architect of the poem
If he is not my fan I care a damn... is what every reader says to him/herself
Titles attract many in many ways
some prefer sexy ones
many just any
read a line or two or pass on
as if CORONA has shone
red in its colour stan

Glad you have posted it in the stream
some gals and guys hopefully now at me shall scream

Title what !
Ah Loved
or
O Lovedly

which would you prefer please
Stream it clearly
like the breeze
Now let's look in and read

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 1 month ago

great

so you prove my
this workshop could end point
who is /was the poet
title is just a whim
o poet friend

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 1 month ago

I scratched my bald head IF

IF only I could replace it
WELL RUDYARD made it
let's be happy
If
only you had read my
If
thanks stan
should continue
it's good to pass time

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

So

All would be good. But what is it about the simple title He chose which could cause a person to read the poem?

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

short or long

And NO I'm not talking about that lol. Give me your thoughts on when a short or long title might be best.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hi Teddy

Don't post any poetry until I ask you to do so. I have a particular sequence in mind for this shop that I think you will understand as we go along

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

No problem

You just got a bit ahead which means you are involved that's all

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Hi, I'm posting your poem

Hi, I'm posting your poem here and then I'll post my comments,

Pater
I had so much to tell you
A while ago away;
And, although our tidings few,
There seemed so much to say.
When you were old ~ whilst I was young,
I might have listened when
A weave of words, together strung,
Were tendered now and then.

But note! the hour has wandered late
And dulls the muse of mind;
Time and tide, for no man wait ~
Ago remains behind.
So words unspoken, not to know,
Are words that time forgot,
They mattered to me then, ago
But now they matter not.

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Hi Alan, here in Argentina

Hi Alan, here in Argentina "pater" is widely recognised. As Spanish is one of the Romance languages that of course come from Latin, no problem. I approve of it for your title.
I understand that there always remain things that one would have liked to say to one's parents before they died. I, for one, would have liked to thank them for speaking English to me from when I was a baby, when most people speak Spanish. It made it so much easier in later life.
And I wish I'd thanked my mother for reading poetry to me until I could read and memorise it, it was so easy then. She also taught me all about growing veggies and caring for our garden. Cooking and much more. I thought about this lack of thanking them rather late in life.
Your poem reminds of all this. The rhyming is very good, I'm not sure you mean what I have interpreted, but never mind, it's helped me and we all get different meanings out of poems. Thanks for that.

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Hello again, Alan. I was

Hello again, Alan. I was remembering that in archaic English people said "pater" and "mater". The Lord's Prayer in Latin begins with "Pater Noster", the equivalent of "Our Father..."
Bye until we're called again.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Sigh.... I stay gone a couple of hours and ya'll

just run wild lol. OK at this point I want each of you to look through your own poetry and find a poem which you think has a weak title. DO NOT POST IT YET. I will call on you to post it. I want each poem to receive a good going over and that won't happen if the stream is flooded by everybody at one time. So go look for a suitable poem and I'll begin calling for them this evening.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

OK, next phase

Just because we are about to start exercises doesn't mean that general discussions on titles now ends. But on to first assignment.
Gracy and Alan, please post one of your own poems whose title you are displeased with. Put (title shop) beside the title so everybody will know these are workshop submissions.
Once the poems are posted then other shop members are to comment on the poems and offer up a title which they think is better.
This phase of exercises will be done 2 poems about every other day unless a reason comes up that shows slowing down or speeding up will be better.......stan

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

OK, got it, stan. I'll post

OK, got it, stan. I'll post it tomorrow, God willing and the weather permitting, as my mother used to say. Gracy

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Thanks

Don't forget to comment ob the other posted poem

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

My River (title shop)

In the bend of the river,
fireflies,
silent navigation
adrift, you and I,
in yesterday’s whirlpools.
Numbed by shadowy depths
in shared memories,
we’ll scatter
our secrets and fears
on the arcane backwaters
over which we lean.
River of my childhood, my river.

In the bend of the river,
dragonflies,
sailing the unknown
on ripples of unsung melodies
for the sensual ear.
Together
we’ll caress the sky
mirrored by circles of light
round yonder willow trees.
River of my childhood, my river.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hi Gracy

Please transfer this to the stream. Having everything on stream will, I hope, raise interest in the workshops. So we will confine general discussions to this page but post all poems along with the comments on poem on stream

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 1 month ago

Hi, it's in the stream, at

Hi, it's in the stream, at least that's where I always post my poems, there have been quite a few comments in relation to the title.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hello all

Apologies for be AWOL, I was having comp problems

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Next Up

OK. I am very pleased with everybody's participation level. The next two people to submit a poem are Teddy 15 and lovely. Please do not post until Sunday

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Now

Something to think about. What are ya'll's thoughts on using a line or phrase from a poem for its title?

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Next!

tyro and Rula, will ya'll please post your poem whose title you are unhappy with today? Post it on stream With the existing title and don't forget to put (title shop) next to title.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

AN OLD MAN'S WINTER NIGHT by Robert Frost

All out of doors looked darkly in at him
Through the thin frost, almost in separate stars,
That gathers on the pane in empty rooms.
What kept his eyes from giving back the gaze
Was the lamp tilted near them in his hand.
What kept him from remembering what it was
That brought him to that creaking room was age.
He stood with barrels round him - at a loss.
And having scared the cellar under him
In clomping there, he scared it once again
In clomping off; - and scared the outer night,
Which has its sounds, familiar, like the roar
Of trees and crack of branches, common things,
But nothing so like beating on a box.
A light he was to no one but himself
Where now he sat, concerned with he knew what,
A quiet light, and then not even that.
He consigned to the moon, such as she was,
So late-arising, to the broken moon
As better than the sun in any case
For such a charge, his snow upon the roof,
His icicles along the wall to keep;
And slept. The log that shifted with a jolt
Once in the stove, disturbed him and he shifted,
And eased his heavy breathing, but still slept.
One aged man - one man - can't fill a house,
A farm, a countryside, or if he can,
It's thus he does it of a winter night.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Next up

Would c lynn brooks and Lavender now please post your poems on stream. Be sure to put "titles shop) right next to the title so everybody can see them easily.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Time to start thinking of the next step. Just thinking right now

don't post anything yet. I am sure we all have a few wonderful titles rattling around in our heads that we can't seem to fashion a poem for. In the next exercise we will post that title here. I will then randomly assign two members to write a poem for one of the titles. the purpose of this exercise is to show that a title can actually lead in many different directs. But for now just mull your orphaned titles around so you will be real.....stan

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Finding titles

I have been led to understand that there are places to go on line where one can find titles. What do ya'll think of the idea of using that kind of source?

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Next up

Would Sparrow and Mark please post your poems whose titles you are not happy with now. Please post on stream with (titles shop) next to your original title. Thanks

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hy everybody

Have ya'll ever had a title pop into your head then written an entire poem based on the title?

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

OK

Things seem to be slowing down. So will all members who have Not posted their weak titled poems on stream please do so now. Be sure to put (title shop) next to your title so it can be easily spotted.Thank you

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Next Exercise

Let's all now post a poem here which you have come up with that needs a good poem to go with it. Don't post the title on stream.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Nope

Post the title here only. I will assign 2 others to write a poem for your title. This will show that a title can lead to more than one interpretation of what is expected

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

I

hope it works out well

Rula

Rula

5 years 1 month ago

My title

"Titles make the difference"

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

lol

very timely for this shop

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

here's mine

WHERE FENCES ARE BUT MEMORIES
Submitted by scribbler on Sun, 2012-07-15 20:15

These tall and somber gray pine trees,
I won't begin to guess how old,
whose tops, only, are moved by breeze
mask memories of tales untold.

The pines end where the slopes turn steep
change marked by ancient oaks and beech.
where squirrels play and tree frogs peep
on land unmarred by steel plow's reach.

Now and then a locust post
stands wrapped in an old root's embrace.
I've seen them once or twice at most,
it brings a wry smile to my face.

On closer look these virgin woods
reveal a world that used to be:
a chimney where a home once stood,
worn terraces for all who see.

Or here and there some cedars grow
thanks to birds perched on a vanished fence
perhaps a hundred years ago,
an edge within woods now grown dense .

Through such woods quiet voices drift
almost unheard on sylvan breeze.
They come here through some type of rift
where fences are but memories.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Thanks

For your feedback. I now await other posting both their comments on using a poem line for title and posting their Own poems in which they did so

Rula

Rula

5 years 1 month ago

Free drops of ink

Sorry I'm unable to come up with sth new. This is an old piece. Always looking for improvement

Free drops of ink
have forth called
my innate talent,
my inner poet.

They've shown me how
potently they can write
about the unseen and
feelings deeply hidden.

They've never failed
to draw fresh images
sometimes fetched from Hell,
and others from Eden
.
They've sweetened the dreams
once by nightmares stolen,
and peacefully re-gained
empires earlier fallen.
.
They left some hearts
alive and others broken,
yet they have always kept my
heart and eyes opened.

Always leaving my
mind thinking ,oh my!
Have I the right
words chosen?

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hello

I expect all poets wonder if their words really make any difference. I fear that Most of them won't until after we are gone. As to a possible new title maybe Ink Set Free?

Rula

Rula

5 years 1 month ago

Stan

Totally agree with your point of view. I thought your title fits as well.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Hi Teddy

Thank you but this is enough from a single member. Perhaps some of the other members will post something

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

No problem

I know how things can tie up our time. I'll keep you as a member but not call on you.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Thanks Gee

We will begin the next exercise when we get a few others to offer up some titles

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

Anybody

Who has not yet posted a title in search of a poem on this thread please do so now

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

OK folks here we go with next exercise

In this one I will assign each member a pair of titles to choose from . They will then write a short poem (under approx. 20 lines) . Post this poem on line with (title shop) next to it and state who supplied title in author's notes.

S

scribbler

5 years 1 month ago

First assignment

Geezer, please choose one of the titles supplied by Rula. Write a poem and post it on line with (title shop) next to title.

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Next up

Teddy would you please post a poem using one of my titles? Don't forget to put (title shop) next to title

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Also Alan

Would you please post a poem using one of Geezer's titles?

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Rula

please choose from Alan's titles and write a poem. Don't forget to put (titles shop) next to title

S

scribbler

5 years ago

We are still awaiting

Titles from Lindame, tyro,Sparrow, Lavender. C lynn brooks and lovely. Just post 2 titles each on this thread

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Next assignment

Scribbler please write a poem using Teddy's title "On this lonely road I roam"

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Still awaiting

Titles from Lindame, tyro,Sparrow, Lavender. C lynn brooks and lovely. Just post 2 titles each on this thread

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Last assignment

Geezer would you please submit a poem using Teddy's title "Birds Without Wings"?

S

scribbler

5 years ago

Final phase

In the last part of this shop I will submit some lesser known (I hope) poems by famous writers sans their titles. This will be done on stream. You will all then come up with a title for each poem . IF you recognize a poem just say so. DON'tT post the real title. When all poems have been given a title I will reveal the author's title and we can discuss if any suggested titles are better than the original and if so why. I'll start posting these poems on Sat. evening

S

scribbler

5 years ago

OK folks

Here is final assignment. I will make a blog post on stream titled "Prompts Via Titles" Now take your time but I want Two titles from each of you that are really good titles. These titles will become available to Anybody on Neopoet to use for a poem of their own. I think this will reveal which titles are the best by way of eventually seeing some title we posted being used by another site member.
I am now also gathering ideas Here about how this shop could have been better. Post these ides here. Thank you all for being patient and helping make this shop what it has been............stan

L

Lindame

5 years ago

One Yeats poem, The Two Trees

One Yeats poem, The Two Trees, is a favorite of mine. I love the title as it leaves you wanting or wondering depending I think, on taste or theme, could grab you or not. I did a mirror poem of this poem, btw. Maybe not going to dig that oldie out, as I've seen you don't want that here. Anyway, titles in my opinion, could be descriptive or just numbered, as they did a lot more in the 17th century, it seems? I love Robert Herrick but could never write like he does! Nor come up with the odd titles he sometimes used. Does boring count as intriguing in some cases, I think it does. (depending on the century also)

S

scribbler

5 years ago

i am

Please you found some worth in this shop