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I Accidently Broke A Heart...

She looked so sad and lonely
Her sisters beautiful and bold
I saw it in her eyes
Her spirit said; She's cold

Iced in rivalry with beauty
And lost engagement of wit
She wandered on the battlefield
Her mouth dry, she couldn't spit

I was struck by the defeat
That leaked out from her eyes
I saw the sibling lash marks
Though they did it in disguise

I touched her accidently
While she was giving me my food
An instant I let linger
To let her know, I saw her mood

Startled, like some prey
Discovered by the hounds
She opened up her eyes
Prepared to leap and bound

Relax, my little fox
I see where you are hidden
I'm passing by in secret
The hounds remain unbidden

And so, our little secret
Continued every day
The vixen and the stranger
Our little game to play

She brightened up and smiled
Whenever I came in
Her sisters noticed her and I
And her private little win

Then one day, while not at work
I thought that I'd stop by
I ordered up my usual
When she gave a little cry

I didn't know what caused it
Until I saw her eyes alight
On my wedding band of gold
Hereto out of sight

I didn't mean to fool her
But the damage done
Now as I left the store
I heard her sisters having fun

How silly you must feel
Did you really think it true
You're not beautiful like us
Why would he like you?

I think about that day
Every now and then
I wonder if she remembers
'Cause I never went back again

About This Poem

Last Few Words: True story

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: New York State - USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Poe, Emily Dickenson, Robert Frost, Shakespeare, and many of the poets here at Neopoet.

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

This is a true story...

not meant to be funny, although I can see how it might be misconstrued as such. A real life kind of Cinderella thing I guess.
It was a little sandwich and salad shop Greek, I do believe. There were three of them and the father and mother. Two of the girls, were elder by a couple of years and the youngest was around sixteen? She was the plain one; not what you would call ugly, but the others were very pretty and very obviously Amercianized. She on the other-hand, not so much and just plain. I felt very bad after that. I was sad that I had given her sisters more ammunition to use and never went back. I hope that she was a late bloomer and outshone her sisters and got herself a handsome man and slapped the shit out of those sisters!
~ Geez.
.

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

I really did...

feel bad for her. It was a hopeless situation. I was already married and had no intentions, especially as I was in my early forties and she only a babe of around sixteen. Although, I would imagine that the parents would have been glad to have a suitor like me, as such things are routinely done in some countries. Thank you for your read and comment. ~ Geez.
.

lovedly

lovedly

4 years 11 months ago

Hi Gee after a long time I see

when an old y falls or marries a youngly
then after a few years
'others read the library book
it happens in many counties '
don't now worry
she must be enjoying
with many

C

c lynn brooks

4 years 11 months ago

Gee

accidently hmmm no such thing
you went for the underdog good for you
your little story is sad though

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

Really...

I didn't mean to bring hurt to that girl. ~ Gee.
.

Lavender

Lavender

4 years 11 months ago

I Accidentally Broke A Heart...

Hi, Geezer,
This is so tender, but what is most endearing is that it has stayed with you all these years. I agree with Chrys. You have a very kind heart.
Thanks for this one!
L

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

I believe...

I have done my damages in my youth. I was careless and only had regard for my own heart. After having gotten torn up, I now understand what I should have known all along. "Kind hearts bear scars". Thank you. ~ Geez.
.

Seren

Seren

4 years 11 months ago

Dearest Bro

My heart breaks for her and for you.

What if ... ? My brother this is poetry.

Applause well done. Bravo !

I cannot mess with perfection.
.
Love and higgliest bugs Sis xxx

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

I just want...

to make sure, that everyone knows that I didn't wear my wedding band while I worked, because I worked with some volitile chemicals and they would get beneath it and burn my finger. So I took it off while working and of course, never put it back again until after work and my hands were free of said chemicals. When I stopped in on my day off, I had it on. I never realized until the hurt in her eyes, that she was that serious or I would have found a way to let her know way before that. ~ Gee.
.

Geezer

Geezer

4 years 11 months ago

Thanks tyro...

Just my usual style, but I try to give my stories as much sharpness as I can; seeing as how they are about everyday life.
~ Geez.
.