Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Apr 28, 2021
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
Mother
So this day has come at last,
My only anchor to a sorrowful past.
Through wretched tears you ask forgiveness,
Knowing I want no part of this,
Your empty arms reach for warm affection,
When all you gave was cold rejection.
What do you want from me?
Did you think I would forget so easily?
How am I supposed to feel?
This is somehow so surreal,
Feelings have always been misread,
So many words have gone unsaid,
Yet you're here looking at me,
Hoping to grab and gain my sympathy,
But as always on your special terms.
Another lesson in life I've had to learn.
The room is dark your breath is deepening,
I watch you softly sleeping,
Readying for the end of your time,
And this sentence of mine.
I am the girl you hated now fully grown,
Learnt to fight, doing things on my own.
Your soul has now been released from mortal bonds,
Time for me to be leaving, walking out and move on.
Goodbye Mother
About This Poem
Last Few Words: My mother is a Narcissist and she was always my first bully. Its difficult to know how to feel when the woman you hate is dying infront of you.
Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Geezer
4 years 2 months ago
.
.
The Eccentric poet
4 years 1 month ago
Sorry just seen this
Was this for me or someone who commented? I'm not very smart so I don't think I have the right to critise other people's work and I don't want any weirdness or hate on me, does that make sense? Xxxx
Geezer
4 years 2 months ago
I think that...
your poem, which feels choppy and stutters gives the right feel. But don't let her have the last word! Be the better person and don't take revenge, by letting her go unforgiven. What harm can it do, to forgive her sick and twisted mind? My father was a drunken bully who destroyed our family and did things that will not bear repeating now. We forgave him. He died and I'm glad that I forgave him. I'd like for you to read my poem called "Better Days" [an East Main St. Story]. It was an unannounced visit to his hotel room, that prompted it. Keep writing, I think you have lots of potential and things to say.~ Geezer.
.
The Eccentric poet
4 years 2 months ago
Thankyou
Thankyou so much it hurts so much to see her, I just well up with emotion like I hate her, but she is my mother, she was my my first critic and bully, I honestly don't know how to feel.
Candlewitch
4 years 2 months ago
YOU...
have captured the story of my life!!! you've told the story well and my heart leapt to my throat as I read this. my mother asked me for forgiveness while she lay in her hospital bed, breathing out her last... I gave it to her...I LIED... thank you for writing and posting this piece...I wish I had written this!
*hugs, Cat
-
The Eccentric poet
4 years 2 months ago
Thankyou
Thankyou ! I'm glad it reached you and gave you comfort that you are not alone, I'm so sorry that you went through it too xxx
Candlewitch
4 years 2 months ago
thanks
it is nice to know that I am not alone. and I'm sorry that you went through a screwed-up childhood, too. but your experiences made you into a powerful writer.
*hugs, cat
The Eccentric poet
4 years 2 months ago
Big hugs
Thankyou it releases some of the pain and I appreciate your kind words xxx
Candlewitch
4 years 2 months ago
dear E.P.
I got something positive from my experiences, too...my alter ego; "eddy styx", who writes very dark poetry. eddy styx puts his "rage on the page" instead of acting out. that way nobody gets hurt and the pain does not fester. I would love to have your opinion on "HIS POETRY" .
The Eccentric poet
4 years 2 months ago
Wow an alter ego
I would love to read some of his work x
Simon
4 years 2 months ago
Wow
Some times I wonder why do parents give birth to their children and again turn around to hate them, ( my people says if your baby poo on your laps you do not cut them off you wash it off,wash your baby and move on with other things).
And at the same time to a child no matter how your parent hate you that person is still your parent you can't change anything, so you don't have to take vengeance forgive and move peacefully.
It's a nice one.
The Eccentric poet
4 years 2 months ago
Thankyou
My parents said they wanted a nice little girl but it was too late when they realised it was going to be me. They wished me dead at 5, I wrote about it in Family Portrait, one of my other poems, thanks so much for your feedback xxx