LOST

I feel like a lost thing sitting on a shelf, and that's because I can't find myself.

I'm losing myself at all cost and I'm supposed to be my own boss!?

I hate it and if I don't change it'll be to late to seal my fate. I don't know who I am! my life is going down like quicksand.

Being lost is a funny thought. I'm supposed to be grown but I'm fighting in a war that should't be fought.!

Dam thats just how I was taught, so who's really in fault?

I can't blame cause it's me and i'm still the same...deep inside; a version of me im trying to hide.

I'm trynna get by, but I just keep getting hit by all side's. and i'm highkey trying to hide...

Whers's the old me? the real me? I feel like this life....

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Help me finish it!!

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: U.S.A.

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allan Poe, William Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson

Comments

Geezer

4 years 3 months ago

I see that...

you have only been a member of Neo.
for a few hours, so I will try and help you out.

1] This is not free-verse, it is rhyme
2] Trying to rhyme just to have words rhyme, does not make it poetry
3] You are losing yourself at all costs? What does that mean?
4] You will be too late to seal your own fate?

There are many levels where this is all wrong. I will do you a favor
and straighten out your thoughts and try to make this a poem
Then I want you to finish it!

I feel like a lost thing
sitting on the shelf
and that's because
I can't find myself

I don't want to fight this war
Being lost is a funny thought
My sanity is what I'm fighting for
A battle worth being fought

I have no one to blame
there is nowhere to hide
I just keep doing the same
I know it deep inside

You finish it! ~ Geezer.
.