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Aug 08, 2021
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If Wishes Were...
There are things that I wish for
like; remembering with clarity
where those things that went awry
left the track, and headed for disaster
I wish that I had heeded those inner-voices
and not made poor decisions
and took even poorer actions
Thinking that of all; I was the Master
I wish...I wish...I wish...
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Obadiah Grey
3 years 11 months ago
Heres to all the fuck ups
Heres to all the fuck ups
the whoopsies and oh shits,
the bollocks dropped,
the films that flopped.
and god bless all - halfwits.
Obi.
Geezer
3 years 11 months ago
Yep...
Exactly! ~ Geez.
.
Abby
3 years 10 months ago
Relatable...
The thing I like best about this is that this has been everyone at some point. After doing something I regret there's always that aha moment where I'm like "god, I didn't even really need to do that." I like the line, "I wish that I had heeded those inner-voices."
Geezer
3 years 10 months ago
Yes...
I do try to be relatable to the reader! I am eager to see some more work from you and hope that you will find skills that you will use in your writing the rest of your life. ~ Geezer.
.
Seren
2 years 4 months ago
Doh!!! I'm a tired idiot.
OK I really need to go to bed. I put my comment in the wrong place. Sorry lol
Love xox
lovedly
3 years 10 months ago
If wishes were horses
I know that only
please excuse me Gee
''any one would ride with thee
lol
Do u agree'''
but sadly
NO NO NOT ME
Geezer
3 years 10 months ago
I would...
rather ride than walk, as Killer would tell you. Why, don't you like horses? I was scared of them for the longest time, because I was kicked by one. Really hard! But I don't blame the horse, he was startled and I forgave him. It was so long ago, that he is probably dead now and who could keep a grudge against a dead horse? LoL
~ Geez.
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Seren
2 years 4 months ago
"IF wishes were horses,
"IF wishes were horses, beggars would ride" is a scottish proverb I believe. Loved was trying to recite it I think
Love xox
scribbler
3 years 10 months ago
Hi Gee
Yep we all wish we could have done some things better. But remember that the only people who make no mistakes are people who don't do anything
Gracy
3 years 10 months ago
Hi Geez, your poem is
Hi Geez, your poem is certainly relatable...new word for me...lol. I seem to have erred so often in life that I've lost count.
Original issue to write about, you surprised me!
Enjoyed, Gracy
Geezer
3 years 10 months ago
Thank you...
I try to think outside the box, yet relate to things that will concern my readers. I have no doubt that there are many that wish they had done things differently in certain situations! ~ Where have you been? Let's see some poetry from you! I miss seeing your work. ~Geez.
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Seren
2 years 4 months ago
Dearest Bro
I can't say anymore than this tonight? I wish, I wish, I wish yep I've had that sort of night
Well done I love this one!
Love and higgliest bugs Sis xox