I Once Composed A Poem Come Closer TO ME

Hiya mate,
But for the first line, "It is a known fact there is no smoke without a fire" (A tad cliché)
and the inversion in "of those who his violin did purse"
I really like this piece; I think its well worth pursuing further.

Obi.

You're still here!! It's so nice to see a friendly face. How are you? I'm not going to cut your poem to bits. Well not today anyway lol I'm still find my words again myself lol

Love and hugs Jayne x

I am hardly one to mince words or ideas
when it comes to critique!
I like your theme a lot and feel that
it would be in your best interest
to delete a couple of words here and there
to make this smoother.

You have expressed the thought of his
love for his violin twice within a couple of lines.
I would try something like:

After two kids
his only love now
was his violin
something that only
a true musician would know
The whole world heard
it in these moments

his fingers would...

The rest is great!

Would that we could all die doing what we love. I'm only suggest you read this out loud. It will be easy then to determine the few tiny changes needed

Is beneficial. I try to remember to read all my work out loud, so often there are things that only come to light with that work being spoken.