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May 05, 2022
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All in all
I want to give you my all
When I hear destiny’s call
Before into your eyes I fall
Like a divine waterfall.
Not a moment I’ll stall,
I’ll be stopped by no wall
And fear no damn brawl,
Cause it’s my heart that you stole.
Instead, I’ll stand tall,
I will gladly play ball
Step boldly into the dance hall.
I’ll see you come fall,
Bring back your maroon shawl,
And by the river we’ll stroll.
It is my ultimate goal
To just give you my all.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Jackweb
3 years 2 months ago
Two lovebirds! Lol
A lover man expressing his mutual love and concern over her woman.
A very romantic poetry!
Beautifully worded. Nice piece!
Jack W. Stanley
3 years 2 months ago
Thank you,
Although the poem was an exercise in wordplay, there is love behind it.
Candlewitch
3 years 2 months ago
dear jack,
I liked these lines:
It is my ultimate goal
To just give you my all.
*hugs, Cat
Jackweb
3 years 2 months ago
Yes Cat
Cat every woman would like to hear this lines from their lover. LoL!
"It is my ultimate goal
To just give you my all.
Jack W. Stanley
3 years 2 months ago
Thank you Cat.
Sometimes simple goals can be very hard to fulfill, as often happens in love.
Race_9togo
3 years 2 months ago
This is the kind of 'love' poetry that I like.
Nowhere is the word 'love' mentioned. Instead, you use implication, need, and emotion to tell us exactly what you are feeling.
Excellent love poetry.
I've written quite a lot of these myself.
No real criticisms, just much, much appreciation.
Jack W. Stanley
3 years 2 months ago
Hello Race,
I very much appreciate your comment and will definitely check out your love poetry.
Cheers,
Jack