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May 26, 2022
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I like love I don't like it's pain
I like a brand new notebook and a sharp pencil and how it flows across the pages.
I don't like how I can't find a single word to explain how I feel
I like misty mornings with warm coffee and how the first sip hits the back of my throat.
I don't like how your mug is still on its hanger, dusty and empty like My heart.
I like the sound of rain and its earthy smell,how each drop finds its own path down the window pane
I don't like how when it rains I remember our first kiss and how the drops ran down your nose onto my lips and that I can still taste them.
I like music and how lost I can get in its rhythm,
I don't like how every lyric triggers a memory.
I like long,funny phonecalls late at night and going to sleep with a smile on my face.
I don't like that no one calls me anymore and that I can't remember the last time I smiled.
I like sunflowers and their yellow petals of happiness shining in the garden
I don't like that they die after so many months of trying to grow and become something beautiful.
I like that I believe in love
I don't like that I believed in love.
About This Poem
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Geezer
3 years 1 month ago
A story...
about the world and the things that you enjoy and the things that annoy you. Love seems to be one of the things that can be both a joy and a pain. I like that you hav managed to write this as something other than a list of likes and don't likes. You've made it a matter of emotion and given it a piece of your life. You need a space in between [no and one]. ~ Geezer.
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Words.unwritten
3 years 1 month ago
Have I nor entered it into
Have I not entered it into the challenge? ...how do I change it? ...also thanks for your feedback x
Geezer
3 years 1 month ago
A story...
about the world and the things that you enjoy and the things that annoy you. Love seems to be one of the things that can be both a joy and a pain. I like that you have managed to write this as something other than a list of likes and don't likes. You've made it a matter of emotion and given it a piece of your life. You need a space in between [no and one]. ~ Geezer.
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Candlewitch
3 years 1 month ago
hello words unwritten,
I checked the submissions list and saw that you have entered. no sweat! by-the-way... I think that tour poem is very lovely, and astute. I really can relate to all of your poem. my favorite lines are:
I like music and how lost I can get in its rythem, (rhythm is misspelled)
I don't like how every lyric triggers a memory. I hope to read more of your work, soon!
*hugs, Cat
Words.unwritten
3 years 1 month ago
Thank you so much ...yeah I
Thank you so much ...yeah I know my spelling isn't the best especially when I'm using my phone on a tiny screen lol ...I really need to start double checking in the future ..thank you for your kind words x x
Candlewitch
3 years 1 month ago
spelling...
I am the worst offender! always using spell check...it helps me a little bit, lol!
*hugs, Cat
~
Words.unwritten
3 years 1 month ago
Definitely need to start
Words.unwritten
3 years 1 month ago
Definitely need to start
lovedly
2 years 12 months ago
Perhaps I am new to such like creativity
you have said so many times
how
I do...and I don't
To my simplistic mind
I dare comment
as all here are great edifices of poetry
but
Do think
too many times ''I and do and I do not ...''
may indicate the shortcomings
of the thesaurus
But I do wish you pardon me
for this intrusion
especially when you are contesting.
Just pardon me