Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

This poem is part of the contest:

Neopoem Of The Week Contest August 28th to September 3rd 2022

(Read More...)

I Have Seen Death

I’ve found more bitterness
The burden of vanity
Everlasting depth I have seen
That killed than death.

I’ve seen more deaths in the earth
In their mouths are toxicant,
They’re beautiful and sweeter than death
Though, through them the paradise was lost
By their lust for fruit
And whatsoever their hearts desired
Kept not from them
They’re the tiny speck on men’s eyes
Madness that bestow upon men’s hearts.

I’ve touched that vanity
By their softie, paradise was gained
The crook which cannot be made straight
Yea, I hate life for all is vanity.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: The deaths are the women... and the story relates with a biblical allusion. Eve in the garden of Aden.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Osun State, Nigeria, NGA

Favorite Poets: William Wordsworth, Niyi Osundare, Wole Soyinka, J.P Clack

More from this author

Comments

Celso G. Tertins

Celso G. Tertins

2 years 10 months ago

i love the illustration of

i love the illustration of the many forms of death more than the passing of one's body. spiritual death, emotional deterioration, the hardening of the heart. the biblical allegories add a nice touch. well done. a proper poem.