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Jan 17, 2023
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eternity
every day they looked and found;
they discovered one another
with every passing night they dreamt
and saw their star-crossed lover
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction: How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Geezer
2 years 6 months ago
Too short...
I know that you said all that you had to say, but I wanted more! Good job. ~ Geezer.
.
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 6 months ago
It’s stunning
One suggestion
every day they looked and found;
they discovered one another
with every passing night they dreamt
and saw their star-crossed lover
I felt that “and” to be extraneous. Aside from that small detail it’s really very pretty.
Tim
Candlewitch
2 years 6 months ago
hello,
excellent work!
*hugs, Cat