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Jan 18, 2023
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Forgive But Never Forget
Forgive the ones
who will
and have forgotten
you.
For if you don't your
heart will
continue breaking
and never fully
heal.
Cry the tears of
sorrow
on a shoulder
or by
yourself.
You have the
strength in you
to once again
love and carry on.
So always forgive
but never
forget.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 6 months ago
Perfect in undertaking
I think you said exactly what you wanted to, exactly how you intended. I think the message comes through clear as day.
I have two small corrections
Forgive the one's (ones)
who will
and have forgotten
you.
You can lose the apostrophe on “ones”
You have the
strength in you
(to once again to)
love and carry on.
one of these “to”s can go and it doesn’t matter which one.
Superb job, vulnerable yet affirming,
Tim
Heather Perry
2 years 6 months ago
Thank you
Thank you for showing me my errors and thank you for your comment.