Alex Tanner

Feb 04, 2023 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

This poem is part of the challenge:

February 2023 Challenge When The Frost Bites

(Read More...)

When The Frost Bites

Dead!
Lying limp and bare,
Frozen through as Winters cold
Froze her body, burnt her soul.

Dead!
My fault
No one else to blame.
I could have protected her
I neglected her.
Now winter's icy blast has frozen her.

She don't like frost,
Polka Dot.
So now she lies
Dead in her pot.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Isle of Wight United Kingdom

Favorite Poets: Poe, Swinburn, Bob Dylan, Spike Milligan, Alfred Noyes, Kipling., Many Others.

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

RoseBlack

2 years 5 months ago

Very powerful

I like the use of imagery to convey your emotions. The ending was a bit different than I had expected. Good job.

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Frost

Thank you Rose, not too bad for a five minute scribble. Alex

Obadiah Grey

2 years 5 months ago

Yeah, I have a rubber plant

Yeah, I have a rubber plant named Brian that spends the winter indoors.

I'm guessing "Polka Dot" was an Orchid or something similar?
(Well, I'm hoping its not a cherished cat! )
I like the twist, the brevity,,,, the emphasis on the two,,, "Dead!"s.

Obi.

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

polka dot

Thanks Obi. Its a pretty little bushy plant with variegated leaves. Alex.

Geezer

2 years 5 months ago

for resuscitation? Maybe cloning? I have had luck with cloning a plant from not quite dead roots.
I have a [I call them Forever plants]. They don't need soil, just water and as long as you keep them warm and watered, they will thrive. I left mine touching the glass of a window where I keep it, and it lost most of its leaves. I love that plant and was heartbroken that I had cause such damage. I feel your heartbreak. Nicely done, ~ Geezer.
.

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

no chance

absolutely had it, i was away for a few days so it had several nights at very low temperature, Alex

Lavender

2 years 5 months ago

When The Frost Bites

Hello, Alex,
I am so sorry. I have three green buddies who bring much joy. Well done conveying your thoughts in so few words.
L

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Thank You

Thank you L. Alex

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Nuts

Hello l. In this instance it was not flowers or shrubs (though I have lost them in the past). I had gathered some walnuts, about a dozen, and set them in pots. To to my delight 3 germinated and were doing well, then I went away. We had some hard frosts and that was that. Alex

Jackweb

2 years 5 months ago

Well done!

I like your flow of words, and that makes a perfect rhythm.
.

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Nuts

Thank you Jack. l. In this instance it was not flowers or shrubs (though I have lost them in the past). I had gathered some walnuts, about a dozen, and set them in pots. To to my delight 3 germinated and were doing well, then I went away. We had some hard frosts and that was that. Alex