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THE UNFORTUNATE TIME
The fire of time
is burning us
we're now groaning in pain.
Our democracy has woefully failed us!
now a stinge to humanity
What a shame?
New naira notes policy
has broaden
a cloud of darkness!
The anguish of grief,
hunger and a surge of
anxiety has melted us.
Our hopes are lost
in the sands of time.
Where do we go from here?
You've been answering
a giant of Africa but, you've
lost your vigour and integrity.
What ails you to be eroding
at this time your citizenry
needs you?
Your banking system
has nothing to write
home about.
For estimation of
immeasurable queues
lengths and unknown.
We're highly disappointed
in this cashless society
you have Inaugurated.
CBN's new notes swap have
transpired an insurrection
that could bring a ceaseless
uproar, civil disobedience
that could rip the nation into
havoc and untold hardship.
©® Onyinyechi Cosmos Etu
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Candlewitch
2 years 5 months ago
dear Onyineche,
in this sentence: needs you a lot? remove: (a lot) for a smoother finish to the line. that is the only suggestion that I have.
your poem is a heartfelt plea that stirs the soul!
*hugs, Cat
Jackweb
2 years 5 months ago
Alright Cat!
Thank you very much. I really appreciate your suggestion.
.
Jackweb
2 years 5 months ago
Truly...
you've a bird's -eyes view on the theme of this poem. Thank you so much for reading and commenting. You really nailed it.
.
M4GG0TM3NT4L
2 years 5 months ago
oooo
i just really like the rhythm of this!! very pretty :)
Jackweb
2 years 5 months ago
Wow!
Thank you!!!
.
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dear JackWeb
I am so sorry that your country is in chaos.
I think this does have really good rhythm when it's read a couple of times I got right into it
Well Done!!!
kind regards Seren
Jackweb
2 years 5 months ago
I really...
appreciate your time of reading and commenting. Much appreciated esteemed poet.
.