Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Neopoem Of The Week July 24 To July 29th 2023 Winner
THE LONELY ONES
Some are widows, some widowers
or stuck in marriages gone stale
others outlived all their friends
living in a world gone pale.
Most have faces etched by time
with hair of white or gone away.
They are there if one just looks
as they sit with little left to say.
Even when within a crowd
of people they purport to know
you'll notice that they don't say much
as they feel their isolation grow.
Their silence doesn't mean they're dense
indeed deep within their silent shell
often burns a near genius
longing to leave their private hell.
I know all about the lonely ones
all the ones you know and sometimes see
for all too often that isolated soul
is.....
About This Poem
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
1 year 11 months ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
It is not feasible to offer feedback.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Alex Tanner
1 year 11 months ago
I used
I used to do a lot of sessions in retirement homes and what you have here is a very good description of so many residents. You could add much more to this as they are affected in so many ways, Still. a perceptive piece. Alex.
scribbler
1 year 11 months ago
Hi Alex
I kept having to fight off the urge to keep writing on this one but I'd decided before hand to keep it short. I' an pleased I captured the angst involved
Lavender
1 year 11 months ago
The Lonely Ones
Hello, Stan,
I agree that you've captured this loneliness. As I get older, I am clearly understanding how this happens so easily and so frequently.
Thank you,
L
scribbler
1 year 11 months ago
Yes it seems to become worse with age.
Appreciate your dropping by
Ruby Lord
1 year 11 months ago
Congratulations scribbler on
Congratulations scribbler on winning poem of the week a well deserved award. Ruby :)
scribbler
1 year 11 months ago
Thank you
It came as a complete shock to me
Alex Tanner
1 year 11 months ago
worthy
A worthy win. Alex
scribbler
1 year 11 months ago
hello
I am pleased you think so
Candlewitch
1 year 11 months ago
dearest Scribler,
many years ago, I worked in a nursing homes as a hired companion for elderly ladies who had lost their husbands. I aided them in their ablutions, getting dressed and anything else they needed. we read and played cards and had long talks. they loved to talk and I loved hearing their tales of younger days. at a young age I learned to respect the elderly and was aware of their qualities.
I also saw, first-hand the lonely and forgotten ones quite literally withering away. waiting and hoping for a visitor.
Great Poem, Congratulations on the win!
*love, Cat
scribbler
1 year 11 months ago
Hi Cat
I expect working in a nursing home is a sad thing as the old people slowly leave
Jenifer James
1 year 10 months ago
Yes, it can be sad. I was a
Yes, it can be sad. I was a Nurse Educator working mostly in palliative care, but some of it is beautiful: meeting extraordinary people at the end of their lives, hearing the depth of their stories, holding them quietly.
Jenifer James
1 year 11 months ago
Congratulations!
Well done! What a great winner! Congratulations on this poem, Scribbler. You catch the essence of old age beautifully.
scribbler
1 year 10 months ago
Hello Jen
I appreciate your dropping by. Now if In could just escape the reality of getting old lol
Jenifer James
1 year 10 months ago
Tough call, that one
Tough call, that one Scribbler. Cryogenics are the rage, but not for me! Enough will be enough.
Lavender
1 year 10 months ago
Hello, Stan!
Congratulations!
L
scribbler
1 year 10 months ago
Thank you
It took me totally by surprise
Jenifer James
1 year 10 months ago
What! Old age?
What! Old age? Being born took me by surprise.
scribbler
1 year 10 months ago
Yep. Next birthday I'll reach 7 decades
Old enough that my mind recalls what I used to do then my body says no way lol