Lavender

Oct 04, 2023 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Beyond All Loss

This moment is not born for carefree thought,
its labor, once of bliss, was all for naught.
Pray tell, my broken heart, the wretched why
in my hour of mourning, I shall not cry?

Call the children indoors from cheerful play,
banish all sounds of laughter from this day.
Deny all logic, hurl away sweet peace,
this suffering demands all joy to cease.

Recoil today's luminous break of dawn,
shut the open windows, have curtains drawn.
Dim the rude lights, pull blankets from the bins -
night air cuts deep, harsh evenfall begins.

I am now fractured and laden with grief,
My Love, death has stolen you, like a thief.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: A sonnet about the loss of love...

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Billy Collins, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

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Comments

Shelby Pryor

1 year 9 months ago

I think...

This is heart-wrenching, but beautiful. I can't think of a single thing I would change. Great work!

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Hello, Shelby,

Someone dear to me recently experienced an abrupt and overwhelming loss within just a few hours of the day. This is the way it felt to me.
Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts.
L

RoseBlack

1 year 9 months ago

Beautiful

But heart wrenching....the loss of love is indescribable...well done

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Thank you, Carrie,

Sometimes a person may need to shut down for just a bit to completely grasp the reality.
Thank you for reading!
L

RoseBlack

1 year 9 months ago

How true

My thoughts are with whomever is going through this right now.

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Thank you...

so very much.
L

Candlewitch

1 year 9 months ago

dear Lavender,

wow! my favorite lines: the whole poem. it was like a smack in the head. really intense, but artfully crafted.

my hopes and thoughts are with the bereaved... Cat

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Hello, Cat,

I am always touched by your kind comments.
Thank you,
L

Ruby Lord

1 year 9 months ago

Hi Lavender, your poem has a Shakespearen style. As I read it again I was struck by the depth of the poem and how it grew deeper and I could visualise every word in moments of grief I have experienced in the past.
Your last two lines;
I am now fractured and laden with grief,
My Love, death has stolen you, like a thief.
Really hit home, hard.
Well done, Ruby :) xxx

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Hello, Ruby,

Sometimes there is a period of horrible shock in fresh grief. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I appreciate you!
L

paleoray

1 year 9 months ago

Such a beautifully written

Such a beautifully written sonnet. It is filled with such heart wrenching grief and despair. You describe the sudden state of shock of losing a loved one so well in your poem. Your third stanza is my very favorite as it relays the strong emotion of withdrawal felt during a state of trauma. Such a well written piece. Bravo. May I express my sincere condolences to you and your friend for your loss. Peace and comfort I wish for you both.

Lavender

1 year 9 months ago

Hello, Paleoray,

Thank you for your very kind words.
L