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Apr 30, 2024
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DUTY
Having sex I didn’t want
With someone I no longer love
I turn my face away
So he won’t see the tear drops
Trying to escape my eyes.
I make the moves and sounds he needs
To think we’re still a couple
But in the hollow of my heart
I know that he’s a little boy
And I can’t be his mother.
ljm
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
tyro
1 year 2 months ago
Ladymac
that's a pretty heavy duty, I hope the protaganist finds a way out.
Tyro
Geezer
1 year 2 months ago
I like...
the short, concise piece, like you've already thought about it too much already.
Watch your tenses. I get what you mean, but the tenses are important.
Pick one or the other and stick with it.
In order to keep the piece in the here and now,
use " Having sex I [don't] want"
otherwise it should be:
Having sex I didn't want,
I [turned] my face away
So he [wouldn't] see...
The last five lines say it all. Nicely done, ~ Geezer.
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