Rise Sun

Your magnificent light
bullies its way through,
to the earth turned face

Of heavy dark clouds.
Your brightness pushes past
their ponderous will.

(what dark vault of sky!)

But continue golden sun, rise,
playing below the horizon
you face is hidden from me.

But rise, rise golden sun;
I would see your face,
I would know your warmth.

I would see autumnal orange
In your golden light:
such richness of color to see.

Rise soft sun, flood my eyes
in your golden light;
turn my head to your high!

O' just flood this heart
In that simple joy to be!

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: The Nederlands

Favorite Poets: William Butler Yates, Wallace Stevens, Giuseppe ungaretti, William Blake

Comments

neopoet

1 year ago

Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version

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Geezer

1 year ago

In the beginning...

of the fourth stanza, you should let the line begin with "Rise, rise... and the line before should have an [r] at the end of you.
~ Geez.
.

tyro

1 year ago

Hi Geezer

Rise, rise has merit, I will thing on it.. thanks for the comment.

Tyro

Lavender

1 year ago

Hello, Tyro,
A nice feeling of Shakespeare. I can't help but wonder about the context - I sense that it is a defined exchange, but I'm not certain. I would love to know more! Very intriguing! The second to last stanza: you have used "son" as opposed to "sun" - is this intentional?
I'll be back after your response!
L

tyro

1 year ago

Hi Lavender

it's just the anticpation, joy and beauty of the sunrise. and yes, son should be sun.

Tyro

Lavender

1 year ago

Hello, Tyro,

Thank you! I absolutely understand now. I think I was searching for some meaning behind "son." I feel the energy and joy in the brilliance of the sun rise. Lovely.
Thank you,
L