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Aug 16, 2024
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UBURU EARLY 19s
On a good night
A woman makes a special meal
gathers kinsmen for a feast
high table for her husband
koboless wives go barren for the time being.
Kneel down woman
Beg your husband
Let him give you children
If he will consider, this night will count
After a girl child, mtchw.
Hunger has no compassion
And pregnant wives are prone to beating
Make up your mind
Harvesting his yams still better than ulcer.
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
10 months 2 weeks ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
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Geezer
10 months 2 weeks ago
Yes...
Your theme is a troubling one,
there are many places in this world where poverty and ignorance
are rampant and all due to the greed of those in power.
Nigeria is one of those places. Men there are prone to violence as a way of life
and proving that they have control of at least one aspect of their life.
Their families, especially wives are little more than chattle.
Being a woman in Nigeria, must be harder than I could ever imagine.
This elemental poem, basic in thought and design, is a part of a cultural revolution.
~ Geezer.
.
Leslie
10 months 1 week ago
Great job!
Many wise words from Geezer. I feel anger and frustration, most likely from personal experience!