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Sep 16, 2024
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Love Addict
I used to think that rehab was the end all be all,
Anyone sent there would never be addicted again.
Then I met you, and I realized why drugs are so hard to quit.
I swear your kiss has something in it,
Because I’ve never craved something so much.
Your smile is my morphine,
Immediately melting me
And easing my worries.
Who needs heroin when I have your touch?
I get the same euphoric feeling from you.
I’m high on love,
Who needs drugs?
I’m itching for a hit,
You’re on my mind 24/7.
So maybe I’m not a junkie with used needles,
Sunken yellow skin,
Or missing teeth,
But even rehab couldn’t save me
From the way I’m addicted to you.
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
9 months 1 week ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
It is not feasible to offer feedback.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Alex Tanner
9 months 1 week ago
Hello Hippie
Not one of my favourites of your writings but I can't criticise it and I do like your style. Alex
Rula
9 months 1 week ago
Hello H.
I had to agree with Alex.
The metaphor used is well chosen for love addiction, however the rhythm and the flow needs to be smoother in some places. Some lines are so long and read more like prose.
Looking forward to reading the edited version if you choose to.
Thank you for sharing.