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This poem is part of the contest:

Nepoet Weekly 09/15/24 to 09/21/24

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Like Fish in the Reef

Something hidden,
something blue,
something I don’t
care to admit.
Years are behind
many are still ahead.
Many to contemplate
the love that I keep
hidden from view
like tiny fish
in the Great Reef.

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Kentucky, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allen Poe, Maya Angelou, Emily Dickenson

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neopoet

neopoet

9 months 1 week ago

Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Like Fish in the Reef" demonstrates a clear use of metaphor, comparing hidden love to tiny fish in the Great Reef. This comparison is effective in conveying the idea of something vast, complex, and somewhat elusive. However, the poem could benefit from a more detailed exploration of this metaphor. For example, the poet could delve into how the fish interact with their environment, or how they feel about being hidden. This could add another layer of depth to the poem and make the metaphor more vivid and engaging.

The poem's structure is relatively simple, with short lines and no apparent rhyme scheme. This simplicity works well with the poem's theme of hidden love, as it mirrors the idea of something being understated or concealed. However, the poet might consider experimenting with different structures or rhyme schemes to see if they can enhance the poem's impact.

The poem's language is straightforward and accessible, which makes it easy for readers to understand. However, the poet could consider using more descriptive or evocative language to create a stronger emotional response in the reader. For example, instead of saying "something I don’t care to admit," the poet could describe the specific emotions or experiences that make this love difficult to admit.

Lastly, the poem's title, "Like Fish in the Reef," effectively foreshadows the poem's central metaphor. However, the title could be more intriguing or thought-provoking to draw readers in. For example, the poet might consider a title that hints at the poem's theme of hidden love, without giving away the metaphor entirely.

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