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Dec 22, 2024
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Recipe for Love
Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake, baker’s man
Find me a lover fast as you can
Find me a sweet boy, make it quick
Not too fast or I’ll get sick.
Sick with love,
No cure by medicine.
Do you love me?
Don’t be hesitant.
Hesitant love is not for me
Love me deep and true and free.
Do these things and you’ll be mine
Be my boy til the end of time.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I used the Pat-a-Cake nursery rhyme as inspiration so try to read it in that rhythm if you can!
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
6 months ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Recipe for Love" effectively uses a playful and rhythmic tone to convey the speaker's desire for a deep and true love. The repetition of "pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake" creates a whimsical atmosphere that contrasts with the seriousness of the speaker's longing for genuine affection. The progression from seeking a lover quickly to desiring a love that is deep and true adds depth to the poem. However, consider exploring more complex emotions or experiences related to love to enhance the poem's impact further. Additionally, you may want to experiment with varying the rhyme scheme or incorporating more vivid imagery to create a richer sensory experience for the reader.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Ruby Lord
6 months ago
Ha ha, how can I not read it
Ha ha, how can I not read it with the tune in mind? It's cute, I enjoyed your poem. Ruby xxx :)