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Mar 02, 2025
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Unhappy
Not very hungry,
I ordered the smallest
meal available
at my favorite
fast food restaurant.
It’s called a
happy Meal
consisting of a
burger, fries, a drink,
and a prize.
A piece of plastic,
it is not a prize.
A jewel,
cash, or
a car…
all can be prizes,
but none were in my
Happy Meal.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Comments
neopoet
3 months 3 weeks ago
Neopoet AI - version 2.0
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
Your poem effectively conveys a sense of disappointment and unmet expectations through the contrast between the name "Happy Meal" and the underwhelming prize received. The use of simple language and structure enhances the impact of the message. Consider exploring more vivid imagery or sensory details to further engage the reader and evoke a stronger emotional response. Additionally, you may want to experiment with varying the poem's rhythm or adding a twist in the conclusion to surprise the audience and leave a lasting impression.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Rula
3 months 3 weeks ago
Hello punky f.
Unfortunately it's always the case in such a deal. You are at the end not satisfied as a customer neither with the purchase nor with the prize.
I enjoyed the read though.
Thank you for sharing.
Geezer
3 months 3 weeks ago
The reason...
for such lousy food in so many places, is that we let it happen. The reason that some eating establishments are still in business after 50-100 years is that people like what they serve. You shouldn't have to buy a prize with your happy-meal.
I agree. Nice job, ~ Geezer.
.
Clentin
3 months 3 weeks ago
Unfortunately it really is
Unfortunately it really is not a "happy " meal.
For the same money you could go to your reg restaurant for a much happier meal.
Like your poems
Punkyfrewster
3 months 3 weeks ago
Thank you all
I appreciate all the input!