The gift of being!

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem explores themes of creativity, personal journey, hope, and perseverance. The structure is straightforward, with mostly quatrains and a consistent, if somewhat irregular, rhyme scheme. The language is direct and accessible, which contributes to a tone of sincerity and earnestness.

The poem’s opening lines establish creation as both a gift and a vital force, but the phrasing “something you live and breath” could be strengthened by correcting “breath” to “breathe” and by considering more evocative imagery to convey the vitality of creation. The line “Travelled a long, long way / just to find words to say” introduces a sense of journey and struggle, but the poem does not provide specific details or images to ground this journey, which could make the emotional stakes more tangible for readers.

The second stanza introduces the idea of guidance by “angels,” but the reasons are “unknown.” This ambiguity could be developed further; as it stands, the poem relies on familiar spiritual motifs without interrogating or personalizing them. The use of “life would fall at my feet” is somewhat vague and could benefit from more precise language to clarify the speaker’s experience.

Throughout the poem, the speaker expresses hope and a desire for self-actualization (“My hope it is just to be / all that I want to be”), but again, the lack of concrete details or unique turns of phrase limits the impact. The mention of playing guitar and singing “songs of remembering” hints at nostalgia and personal history, but does not elaborate on what is being remembered or why it matters.

The stanza about justice arriving “in the end” introduces a moral dimension, but the phrase “That’s how things usually work / with all of life’s perceived tragedy” is somewhat didactic and generalizes the complexity of justice and tragedy. The poem might benefit from more nuanced or specific engagement with these themes.

The final stanzas shift to a more intimate address (“If you could see it now”), but the transition is abrupt, and the poem’s addressee is unclear. The closing lines, “Man to man friend to friend,” attempt to universalize the experience, but the poem has not established a strong enough narrative or emotional arc to make this gesture fully resonate.

Overall, the poem’s sincerity is evident, but it would be strengthened by more specific imagery, greater attention to language and rhythm, and a deeper exploration of its central themes. Consider focusing on particular moments or experiences that illustrate the speaker’s journey, and aim for fresh, precise language to convey emotion and insight.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact

Good job here. I like it how you kept the way open for hope to come through. I think it's how we overcome any obsticals.

Great job!

We create our own futures, and I see yours as being bright! ~ Geez.

.