Lavender

Aug 18, 2025 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Writing Poetry In The Park

There is a small, winged creature
on the edge of this page.
Is he curious about what I write?

I'll write about him.

He is tiny,
striped,
itty-bitty-bee-like
with no inkling to sting.

Just hover here, linger,
visit with me

as I drink in the call of the
Mourning Dove,
the Northern Cardinal

while we all battle the dull hum
of distant traffic invading our simple world.

Now there are two small, winged creatures.

Life is a party.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Beneath the sun, under a tree.

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Billy Collins, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

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Comments

Ruby Lord

1 month 1 week ago

Hi Lavender, your poem gave…

Hi Lavender, your poem gave me images of peace, touched by small intrusions into our surroundings. I had to look up the Mourning Dove, as we don’t have them in England. We have woodpigeons or collared doves, so I found your choice of bird added extra depth to your poem. It took me to that slow, relaxed state where sitting in the park allows us to notice even the tiniest details of nature in a positive way. I do think the ending could be improved, it felt as if you left the scene abruptly. Well done, Ruby xx

Lavender

1 month 1 week ago

Hello, Ruby,

I was not familiar with the Wood Pigeon, somewhat similar to the Mourning Dove. Both beautiful birds with calming, peaceful calls. Yes, a state of relaxation. It was a lovely day, not far from the sounds of the busy world, but still a mostly quiet get-away.

I'll work on the ending - thank you for your help with this!

Geezer

1 month 1 week ago

I feel...

just like Ruby, I used to take my lunch from work at a small, wild field not too far from a big-box store, and a busy highway. It was very peaceful, and I noticed many things like sparrows and chickadees watching me. This reminds me of those days. Nicely done, but I do agree that the ending does seem rather abrupt. ~ Geez.

Lavender

1 month 1 week ago

Hello, Geezer,

Your field sounds wonderful - those unexpected places where we take in a bit of peace and connection with Mother Nature.

I'll be rethinking the ending! Thank you so much for your help.

Always appreciated!

Rula

1 month 1 week ago

As always

The Lavender lady let me in her company with all those thoughtful details. I felt like I was there. Just right to your side.

I especially like the music in these lines

He is tiny,
striped,
itty-bitty-bee-like
with no inkling to sting.

Thank you dear for sharing!

Lavender

1 month 1 week ago

Hello, Rula,

The moment(s) felt precious, very present. And yes, I can always sense your gentle soul enjoying the moment, too. So fortunate to share these positive thoughts with like minds!

Thank you!