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This poem is part of the workshop:

UNFINISHED WORKS

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This poem is part of the contest:

01/26 A Life Changing Moment

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PAIN

Pain are words at which I can’t follow
Love is a dangerous game
That we follow
I swallow my pride
N glide
Through the life I always wanted
In my mind
If I knew being in pain
Would lead me to you
I’d do again n again
Till my heart is threw
Pain is a gain
To never be weak again
You are me and I am you
Listen to me
I listen to you
You carry me
I’ll carry you
Together we’re better than ANY PAIN

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Through the eyes of you Listen to the words in your head Read carefully Innerstand me not understand me

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
[This option has been removed]

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

3 months 2 weeks ago

I am...

sure that you will find followers here, you have a good feel. ~ Geezer.

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Lavender

Lavender

3 months 2 weeks ago

Pain

Hello, and Welcome!

A compassionate poem.  I think your Last Few Words are intriguing...innerstanding.  Very nice.

Thank you!

Lavender

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 months 2 weeks ago

to quote Lavender...

I agree with her assessment of your poem...hello and welcome to Neopoet!

always, Cat, the candle witch

John Leslie O'Kelley

John Leslie O'Kelley

3 months 1 week ago

PAIN

No one can take the pain away, it's all in your mind anyway. You can walk through a maelstrom of pain, if you keep your composure and meditate. No one else feels what you feel, although we may feel similarly, never give up on your heart! Thanks for writing this poem.