Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Haunting Memory
The silence is deafening, and profound
Her absence makes the night feel so cold
The air escaped his lungs now he drowns
In the depths of hope taking a toll
He prays amidst the ruins and ashes
Yearning for that burning eternal flame
Like impressions of lightning and flashes
Breathing gently while whispering her name
Somewhere in there he finds comfort and solace
In the fantasy of her touch and caress
The shape of her lips that appear so flawless
Like a dream made to imprint and impress
Now the haunting memory of their last embrace
Plagues him with exasperation which takes a hold
The quiet anticipation lives in his headspace
Because he gave her his heart, but she stole his soul
About This Poem
Review Request Direction: Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
Candlewitch
3 months ago
hello Wallyroo92,
This poem...is haunting in of itself, it feels like a whisper that builds in volume... Nice work!!!
always, Cat
Wallyroo92
2 months 2 weeks ago
Haunting Memory
Hi Cat,
I've always felt unrequited love makes for beautiful, profound poetry. I love to write while listening jazz or blues and this just took me there for a minute.
John Leslie O'Kelley
2 months 2 weeks ago
Hi Wallyroo92,
I've felt the same way at different times, but nothing can compensate for someone else's love! The world, however is full of people we can learn to love, I'm not giving advice. Love can make or break you, you have to let go and move on! However you feel, I really loved this poem!
Wallyroo92
2 months 2 weeks ago
Haunting Memory
Thank you John, you're absolutely right. nothing can compensate. I think as writers we tend to capture those emotions from those phases keep them like portraits of time. For those of us who are old enough to keep them like family albums, these poems tend to paint those pictures for me.
I'm really glad you liked this poem.
Hope all is well.