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Sep 05, 2011
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Master and Slave
Times dungeons have never healed
The relationship between
known and unknown
Some bask in the glory of the sun
Some of their own
We all are but passersby
To all unknown
Yet time shears our lives
To the very bones,
We pass out all unknown,
Who the master
Who the slave
Who the follower
Who the knave
Except the naïve,
They are the worst victims of all.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Candlewitch
13 years 10 months ago
Dear Loved,
I find strong feelings in this piece. I most liked these lines:
We all are but passersby
To all unknown
Yet time shears our lives
To the very bones,
always, Cat
weirdelf
13 years 10 months ago
Some good thoughts here
I like the poem.
My only problem is the last line line
Except the naïve
they are the worst victims of all.
Just my opinion.
loved
13 years 10 months ago
Thanks a great deal.... since remedied
I find that an individual /independent edit
adds
the requisite amount of salt,
nay,
sugar
thanks frnd and master.
weirdelf
13 years 10 months ago
I am so glad we have become supportive friends
I know I was very hard on you at times, I hope you can forgive me.
I would like to hear your feedback on my poems. I haven't written much lately but would like to hear your honest thoughts in plain english.
loved
13 years 10 months ago
Sir you honour me
more than I really deserve
i do read ur poems when ever
but can i dare
comment upon a teacher
i wonder ......
none the less
thank you for the offer
i have posted one in ur poems
hope u will like it.
much more the better
weirdelf
13 years 3 months ago
I'm a fuck up
I am no role model. just have a little knowledge and talent.
Do not be afraid to say anything to me, except, as I asked before, try to say it in plain English.
loved
13 years 10 months ago
I dare to tread
Where even angels,
If any do dread,
Many works of creativity,
I have read
And
Many poets to victory lead,
I always endeavour
To help all those
Who for me care
As you do
And
now,my poetry share.