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Requiem For A Dying City

In these human ruins
marking time with helpless anger
makes the differences between
this world and the next
seem almost bearable.

Where the clime marks bloody rust
on blasted shoreline factories
deep-anchored in the broken flesh
of slowly rotting city
in its final death-throes,

the hollow houses all collapse
in slow-festering abandon
few could stop and fewer want to,
where eyeless walls stare vacant
at the empty streets,

and roofs fall slow
beneath indifference's
growing weight
to add more broken ruin
to the pools of aging dark
between remaining streetlights
failing on forgotten corners.

Doors are locked
against the predatory stare
from hopeless eyes
of passing urban refugees
desperate for another meal
or another fix,

and in the growing cancer
spreading outward from
abandonment and pain
we pass but do not listen,
pass by but do not see
that in the shameful end
this is where we really dwell,
at this lowest point of all.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Region, Country: Earth Vicinity (within a five light-year radius), ZZC

Favorite Poets: John Donne, T.S. Eliot, Serendipity, Emily Dickenson, Kailashana, Charles Bukowski, Kabir, Rett, Dalton, W. B. Yeats, William Blake, Rainer Maria Rilke, and many other Neopoet poets; Neopoet has heavily influenced my poetry and my ability to write it well.

More from this author

Comments

weirdelf

weirdelf

13 years 9 months ago

Fuck me dead!

Oh man I wish we had audio on the site now.
I just read this aloud in a subdued but growling voice and knocked myself out.
Perhaps the highest compliment I can give-

I wish I had written this.

Anyone who visits this poem, its a voice poem in addition to it's potent content. Shut off any background noise you can and read it aloud.

Race_9togo

Race_9togo

13 years 9 months ago

Wow

Praise indeed.
It was never in my mind that this was to be spoken, when I wrote it.
But I've said it now, rather than just read it, and you're completely right.
Funny, how these things reveal themselves, isn't it?
Thank you much, my friend, your enjoyment of it makes the writing of it worthwhile.

themoonman

themoonman

13 years 9 months ago

OOOO ...

gave me chills ... quite the read Jim, damn good in fact.
I do have a couple of suggestions, remove "all" from the
first line in stanza three, as in my opinion it's unneeded,
I tend to use the word a lot and in my own work I've been
looking for places to remove it. In the same stanza, the last
line, "at the empty streets", perhaps, "on empty streets"

great poem Jim

Race_9togo

Race_9togo

13 years 9 months ago

Thanks Richard,

Chills are what I was after when I wrote it.
Thanks for the suggestions too, thy're much appreciated.
Glad that you enjoyed this one so much!

Race_9togo

Race_9togo

13 years 9 months ago

Richard,

I thought about your suggestions.
I think "all" is neccessary, or at least a single syllable word, right there, because otherwise the line catches just a touch, and becomes choppy, to me. I think "all" is a bit passive, but I can't think of another word to use in its stead.

"at" versus "on"...I tried it, but using the word "on" makes the abandoned houses inanimate objects, instead of living things, which was the intent, to show them as alive but dying.

Thanks again!

Race_9togo

Race_9togo

13 years 9 months ago

Jayne

A week late and a mind short, lol, I apologise, I can only plead too much to do and too little time do do it in!
Thank you for your enjoyment, it means much to me.

Natural_Mystic

Natural_Mystic

13 years 9 months ago

Amazing

Amazing amazing send shivers down my spine the moment i read the heading to the very last line. Well played sir well played.