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Mar 29, 2012
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When Worlds Collide
Never did he take your hand,
He left you alone,
Lying there,
Letting that last one fall.
Never did you believe,
Because you were smarter than that,
He was the one,
But somehow he changed.
He asked for your hand,
You dove in blindly,
And he never knew,
Why you ran away.
Now alone he keeps himself,
No one knows who he is,
A shadow on the wall,
You were always his whole world.
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
judyanne
13 years 6 months ago
i keep coming back to this
the first verse seems obtuse - i don't really know what you mean
but the rest of the write is captivating
sad...
and i really like the closing lines
'No one knows who he is,
A shadow on the wall,
You were always his whole world' - sad....
love judy