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you'll be enticed
what ever you may say
I shall entice you one day
the charm of a woman
none can resist
no matter how much
one does persist.
I will entice you one day,
if it is not today,
at least
some other day
with all the experience
behind my years
I know by now
what only a girl can do
without any fear,
no matter what her intentions be
her lover that can never see…
how I’ll entice
you’ll never know,
for every guy has a price….
he goes running like mad
when he has laid his mind,
but her enticing ways
one can never find.
only a woman carries that charm,
she is lightening,
he is sound,
the cloud does burst,
there is a sound,
but heard much later,
as lightening flashes,
that much faster
I’m that lightening,
that will consume you
in the vehicle of time
beyond space
where there will be left of you,
no solid trace.
in the far folds of time,
you will be forgotten,
like the boy king
Tutankhamen.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Geezer
12 years 11 months ago
I was...
struck and stuck. Struck at the stark simplicity of your thoughts and stuck with the meter scheme and rhyme.
You always leave me wondering at your purpose. I read most everything you post, but I don't always comment.
Do you ever join any workshops? You might find some little pleasure in a rhyme and meter shop. ~ Gee
loved
12 years 11 months ago
i know no meter.. nor rhyme ..in my time it was inches and feet
but poetry
I still compose
no... no wonders it be
yet so many read including Jess..
i composed since i was three naturally
Ian.T
12 years 11 months ago
Loved
this was very, very good and read quite well, I think that the reference in the last couple of lines could be better but that's just me being picky..
Take care young Bard, Keep writing, Yours Ian.T
loved
12 years 11 months ago
thanks Ian ... my true and honest friend
read my comment for Geezer above..
composed over two years ago
weirdelf
12 years 10 months ago
comment removed
sorry.
loved
12 years 10 months ago
undesired and unappreciated
also an unwarranted comment
does not fit into ethics of NEOPOETS
Sorry JESS...