Rula

Sep 30, 2012 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

This poem is part of the workshop:

Mindful Memorable Freeform: The Challenge

(Read More...)

In search for peace

I once walked
with the empty streets
to meet the dawn
but they never took me there-
where peace could be found.

Instead they led me
to life's lamenting shores
where I endlessly talked
to the empty shells,
to the broken waves,
and to the withering sands
just to find out that
peace has there
forever drowned.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Jordan, JOR

Favorite Poets: I favor the ones who are closer to humanity and , Poets are humanity when the world lose it.

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

Barbara Writes

12 years 9 months ago

Rula

In of peace at the shores of life water
has indeed forever drowned.

I like the many metaphors:

lamentable shores of life
meet the dawn
empty shells
broken waves
withering sands

You really descriptively show how hard it is to find peace which is a serious issue in this world.

Rula

12 years 9 months ago

Barbra

Thanks for dropping a nice comment. really appreciated.

judyanne

12 years 8 months ago

awesome rula

nothing to suggest - a great write

i just love the whole idea - exquisitely said
great word usage to get a real melancholic feel –
once
empty
life's lamenting shores
endlessly talked
empty shells
broken waves
withering sands…

and the end -
‘just to find out that
peace has there
forever drowned’ - wonderful

love judy
xxx

Candlewitch

12 years 8 months ago

Dear Rula,

Great metaphors and message! I loved the imagery in this sad yet descriptive piece. My favorite lines are:

I endlessly talked
to the empty shells,
to the broken waves,
and to the withering sands
just to find out that
peace has there
forever drowned.

love your style!
always, Cat

Ian.T

12 years 8 months ago

A sad write young lady..
We can only teach of our peace, that we shout at the Moon is a waste, we must teach the children of love and understanding.
Firstly though we must teach them to listen to the beauty there is in silence.
If in silence you can hear a sound it is of the universe breathing,
go teach the children that you see each day of the beauty you know is there, Yours Ian.T

alidzain

11 years 5 months ago

Hi Rula

beautiful...

in a world lacking of cheer
where the sunlight's touch
reveals a sad story
i find peace as elusive as ever
a dream ever present
but is yet within reach
until a wise man told me
i have been searching for it
at the wrong places
for peace exist within me
when i reach out to Him
and i recite His Name in my prayers

Alid

Ian.T

11 years 5 months ago

Alid and Rula

Search not to wonder what you can do
The world will not listen to you
Then think of something sacred that will be of use
Your inner self

Teach it to be aware of all things
Then let it be wise in knowing what you can do
If there is nothing that can change those things
Just send Love

If you should wander away to change things
Then take with you a case of unconditional love
Give it away freely to all you meet out there
Just say we care

It is noted by the universe our tears do flow
There in the vastness of space and being
They will know you love your fellow man just so
More none can give

Yenti

alidzain

11 years 5 months ago

thank you

for the kind advice, sir.

alid