Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Sep 11, 2015
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
FROM SPOCK"S VIEWPOINT (metaphor shop poem)
I see all the things called emotions
Which defy all logic to me
people nearly crying oceans
from "sadness" or being "angry".
Tell me how one such as I
can determine how they "feel"
for no matter how I try
I can't comprehend "woe" or" Weal".
Is anger just like being burned
or is it cold as glacial ice?
Is joy like a new theorem learned
and exactly what is "nice"?
About This Poem
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
China Blue
10 years ago
Stan
this came close however
how would an alien know what crying is , or sadness etc but being Mr.Spock I let it go since he was half human
please comment on others that have workshop postings
so far myse;f and Wes
scribbler
10 years ago
Hi Chrys
An unexpected beach trip has gobbled up time in preparation last 24 hours and I'll be off line until Monday evening. I'll catch up then.........stan
Rula
10 years ago
hello Stan
I think the last stanza meets perfectly Chrys's requirements for the 1st assignmen.
Nicely done!!
scribbler
10 years ago
Hi Rula
Thank you. I might should have used a less known personification for an emotionless alien as Wes points out below lol. Perhaps a Borg would have been better.........stan
wesley snow
10 years ago
A Borg!!!
That would have been perfect. A wondering Borg on the verge of revolt without even knowing it as he begins to question human emotion.
What a brilliant idea.
Go ahead and write it. I want to read it.
Or maybe I'll steal it.
scribbler
10 years ago
lol
perhaps the Borg would be a good un. I'll see if I can throw something together tonight. But against this shop resistance may be futile........stan
wesley snow
10 years ago
I'm afraid I don't like the Spock reference.
He's an educated "man" who knows just what sadness is, feels it and ignores it. It is not new to him.
Fun poem though.
scribbler
10 years ago
Picky, picky, picky lol.
I was kinds stuck. Use a near universally known figure or a lesser known (maybe Spock's father Serik or a Borg) as the protagonist. Perhaps I chose badly...........stan